Three Stories, One Day
by MiniTav
Summary: Follow Stan's, Kyle's and Cartman's different perspectives of the same day as each seperate story has an effect on the other ending with a dangerous collision of them all!
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: ****First its Stan's perspective of the day. Although Stan will leave the others it won't be the last you've seen or heard from them in the story, as they'll pop up here and there where you don't expect and sometimes when you don't know! (until of course you've read their side of the story ;))**

**There'll be bits where you don't know why that's happening but don't worry if you follow everyone's story, all answers will be revealed!**

**WARNING: ****One off story created by MiniTav the likes of which has never been seen on FanFiction before. NO FLUFF!**

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><p><span>Stan's day<span>

The day started pretty normally. Stan was out with Carman, Kyle and Kenny on another moneymaking scheme, the one that works best with children their age, selling cookies door to door.

However they weren't being as successful as they'd hoped as they weren't getting many sales just violently shut doors, inches from their faces.

"This is pointless Cartman!" Kyle moaned as they walked away from yet another door that had slammed in their faces.

"We've not been out long enough Kahl!" Cartman said waddling angrily from the door. "Give it time!"

Once at the bottom of the garden Stan leant back against the garden fence of the house they had just been rejected from. Kenny and Kyle joined him rubbing their aching feet.

"Why are we even here this time you guys?" Kyle moaned.

"Yeah." Kenny agreed as a muffle through his coat.

Stan looked at their bored and tired faces and had to agree with them.

"To be honest, I don't know why we even go with him anymore he-" Stan started but was interrupted when Cartman turned to them with his finger to his mouth and shushed them.

The three looked at him with confusion but remained silent and followed his concentrated gaze until it landed on a young boy and his mother knocking on the door of the house next door to the one they were standing outside.

The boy was younger than them but only by a few years and he had a beaming smile and soft brown hair and his mother looked like the kind and gentle type that every son dreamed of and she was looking down at him with her hand on his back and a huge smile of pride on her face.

The four boys watched in anticipation as the house owner that had slammed the door in their faces answered to this young and sweet child and his darling mother. They couldn't hear what was said, or what they were laughing at, but they could tell that the house owner said "Aww" to the young boy after he stretched out his arms and held the box of cookies up. And then they noticed the house owner pass over a few dollars and take a couple of cookies from the child.

Stan, Kenny and Kyle joined Cartman in staring at the child with a dumbfounded and slightly angered expression.

"De fuck?" Cartman said barely moving his face.

"Dude, he just got a sale! What gives?" Stan agreed.

"What a piss take!" Kenny muffled.

The boys watched as the child beamed up at his mother and she placed the money handed to her into her purse. Then, as they began to walk back down the path, the mother took hold of her son's arm very carefully and the closed eyes on the boy, that the four thought were part of the animated beaming smile, remained permanently closed as he walked towards them.

Suddenly the observers felt a little guilty and they stopped staring. They kept their heads low as the child skipped merrily past them clutching onto his mother's hand tightly, both of them smiling.

"Poor kid." Kyle said softly as they watched the blind boy knock on the next door.

"Poor kid? Poor kid? Kahl did you see that wad of cash!" Cartman blurted and the others looked at him in disgust.

"Yeah poor kid! I can't imagine anything worse than being blind!" Kyle replied.

"Being poor and blind, but we know that's not the case with these dirty thieves."

The three stood with wide eyes and gaping jaws, looking at Cartman. Kyle was about to say something else when a shout from someone behind them interrupted him.

"Stan!"

They all turned around to see Wendy looking at him and beckoning him towards her.

"Wendy?" Stan shouted questioning her appearance.

"Can I talk to you a minute?"

Stan looked back at the guys who rolled their eyes. "It'll only take a minute." He said guiltily and walked towards Wendy.

"Stan no! You have to help with my plan! Stan!" He heard Cartman shout as he left the group.

Wendy looked down at her feet and then at him. She looked serious and she kept biting her lip. Stan thought she had probably come out to find him and it made him wonder what could be so urgent that she needs to see him now; come to think of it, he realized he hadn't actually seen her for a while and hadn't spoken to her for longer, which made his curiosity grow for what she might need him for.

"Hey Wendy."

Wendy looked at him for a long time just staring into his eyes and Stan grew confused and slightly uncomfortable.

"Wendy?" He questioned and as if the word was a trigger Wendy moved her head sharply away when he said it.

"Stan, do- do you still love me?" She said softly. Stan thought this was a very strange question to ask. If he didn't like her anymore surely she would be the first to know.

"Urm…yeah I guess?" Stan said unsure how to answer.

Wendy was still looking away from him. "Because I haven't seen you in a while." She said quietly and then slowly turned to him. "Its like you just don't want to see me."

Stan didn't say anything. He wanted to say, well you didn't make the effort either but somehow he didn't think that would help and before he could think of something helpful to say Wendy spoke again.

"Everything we ever do is with your friends and the fatass! I think if you really wanted to be with me you would like to do some of the things I want to do as well."

Stan suddenly felt very nervous and he wished he had never left the guys but Wendy looked at him in the way, which makes his stomach flutter and his heart pound.

"Like what?" He asked nervously.

"Like meeting my friends with me at the mall." She smiled and shuffled closer to him to give him the full effect of her persuading smile that she knows has an affect on him.

Stan looked at her uncomfortably and then back to his friends

"No! No Kahl!" Cartman was shouting something at Kyle and he and Kenny started waving their arms in the air dramatically.

He sighed heavily and then turned back to Wendy; looks like he didn't have a choice in this one.

"Alright." He said and she smiled and giggled happily before taking his arm and pulling him away from his friends.

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><p>Stan and Wendy stood in the mall outside a shop called "Girl Power." A favourite to the girls at his school and it summed up his feelings at that moment waiting for Wendy's backup.<p>

Wendy stood constantly on her tiptoes looking around the faces in the crowd for any of her friends whilst he leant against the wall behind her.

His friends were probably having loads of fun without him; maybe they hadn't even noticed he had gone.

Stan was brought back to the harsh reality from his thoughts when Wendy let out a high pitched scream of delight as she saw Bebe turn the corner and Bebe returned the call with another high pitched scream.

Stan looked at them, standing up from the wall, and thought they looked like tropical birds greeting by flapping their wings as their hands were shaking by their sides before their arms flung open to hug each other; the whole time Wendy was lightly jumping up and down on the balls of her feet.

After hugging each other tightly Bebe took one glance at Stan and then turned away from him to wait for the others with Wendy but he saw her lean, not so subtly, over to Wendy and attempt to discreetly whisper something in her ear. Wendy just nodded back with a smile.

Stan watched them and then slumped back against the wall. He didn't know what to expect of this afternoon, but then again knowing what came next might make it harder to bear. All he knew was that this was going to be a long afternoon.

After a lot more tropical bird wing flapping, jumping and high pitched calling as all the girls, including Sally and a few other of Wendy's friends, arrived they were finally ready to move on to start their shopping spree. First they discussed where they were going to go.

"Ooh ooh how about glamour shoes!" One girl squealed excitedly.

Stan looked at them and swallowed hard before joining their little circle. As he did the girls looked at him sharply like he had stepped too far into their nest. Wendy was the only one who smiled at him and then turned to the girls.

"Hey girls, I brought Stan along with us this time I hope you don't mind?"

Oh they mind, look how much they mind! Jesus they could kill a guy with that stare. Stan thought.

"Ooh!" One girl smiled.

"We've never brought along a boy before!"

"This will be SO fun!"

Stan didn't like the sound of that but before he had anytime to think about it both his arms were grabbed by two separate girls and he was pulled away.

"We'll go to the video store first!" The girls spoke as they were marching him away.

"Yeah and get a DVD for the sleepover!"

Stan's eyes shot open and he turned to Wendy. "Sleepover?"

Wendy just shrugged. "It's what we always do." She said whilst smiling guiltily and all Stan could do was manage a weak smile back.

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><p>At the video store Stan's initial reaction was to walk to his left when they walked through the doors as that's where he, Kyle, Kenny and Cartman always go to get an action film. The girls however continued onwards until they reached an aisle a few aisles down labeled Chick FlicksRomances.

Stan sighed heavily before following the girls in where they were all already looking on the shelves.

He just stood and watched and noticed they all seemed to be giggling at nothing all the time; they never do that at school, well not all the time. He realized he might learn a lot of dangerous things this day and it scared him a little.

The girls began to pick out their favourites and pass them amongst each other so they could all give their verdict. They would squeal excitedly when they picked one out and pass it to a friend who would frantically nod and pass it to the next one or they'd pick one out just to laugh at its cover.

As Stan watched them he noticed they were all looking at the covers and not even taking a glance at the backs where the storyline was. He hesitantly picked up a pink DVD case closest to him and dared to look at the front.

It was a picture of a beautifully dressed woman who was smiling at the camera. She had perfect hair, perfect skin and perfect make-up yet the title of the film was "The Hard Life" Behind her was a muscley looking jock man with thick floppy hair and a tight top around his chest that looked a few sizes too small; he was smiling at her smugly with his arms crossed.

Stan looked it up and down at put it back on the shelf hoping the girls wouldn't see it. Now he could see why the girls had no need to look at the back. He could sum up the whole film just with a quick glance at that picture, then again something told him that that wasn't the same reason the girls were doing it.

"Oh my gosh oh my gosh!" Sally suddenly cried making Stan and the other girls suddenly look to her.

"What? What is it?" Wendy smiled as she ran up to her with a beaming smile.

"Have you seen this guy?" Sally sighed weakly holding a DVD she had picked off the shelf.

Wendy looked down at the DVD and her eyes grew wide. She gasped in shock and placed her hand to her heart before heavily letting the air out whilst slumping weakly onto Sally like she had fainted.

The other girls saw this reaction and crowded around Sally and the DVD and copied the same sort of reaction by clutching their hearts and fanning themselves.

Stan stared at them with one corner of his upper lip raised and he blinked slowly.

"God dam it!" Came an unexpected cry from behind him that Stan recognized. His eyes shot wide open and, forgetting about the girls, he immediately turned to look behind him.

No one was there but he knew they were close so he was about to leave the aisle and look in the next one when Wendy called him back.

"Stan! Come and look at this one, what do you think?"

Stan stopped and looked down at his feet, his thoughts filled with utter dread. He looked up again at the short distance he could travel, the few steps he could take, to seeing someone he knew who could save him.

"Stan!" She called again.

Stan slowly and hesitantly turned back around with a fake smile on his face that was just about holding itself in place. He then slowly moved towards the collection of swooning faces and looked down at the DVD.

It looked pretty much the same as the one he picked up before: a perfect girl complaining about her not so perfect life and a smug looking handsome jock in the background.

He looked around him at the girls and their expecting faces and he realized his fake smile had dropped a little due to his disappointment and hatred for the film genre. So he quickly shot it up again and smiled at them all.

"Looks great!"

"Yay!" All the girls cheered and they all skipped towards the counter to pay for the film.

Whilst in the long queue Stan was beginning to get horrible thoughts of the up-coming night he was going to have to spend with the girls and this film. No boy has ever found out what happens at girl's sleepovers (apart from Butters but he can't really be classed as a boy) and now he was going to have to do it…solo.

Stan looked around him whilst the girls chatted about what they were all going to do next and he looked at all the posters of his favourite films with the flames and explosions and knives and bombs and whilst he was skimming along them all he noticed a small amateur poster with a young boy on it.

He thought he recognized the blonde haired boy and looked closer and harder at it through narrowed eyes to find he was right. It was Butters; only he had two eye patches covering both eyes. Above his picture, in bright red bold writing, it read: Help the blind boy and hear his story! Come and buy a cookie for charity only $1 at the North entrance!

Stan stood utterly bewildered, since when has Butters been blind? He wanted to get a closer look at the poster when the sound of Wendy's voice interrupted again.

"What is holding up this line? We have shopping to do!" She moaned.

"Yeah!" Another girl moaned.

"Hurry up!" Bebe called to the front and a few minutes later the line was finally moving again, much to Stan's disappointment.

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><p>After they left the film shop the girls decided they needed 'the little girl's room' so Stan stood and waited for them outside. Wendy said he could go on and meet them at the shoe shop for a certain time since they'd be doing their make-up but he figured a guy walking in that shop on their own would not portray the right message about him.<p>

I could run now. He thought. I could run and by the time they came out-Wendy came out-I would be out of the mall.

As much as he wanted to he would probably regret it later so tried to distract those thoughts out of his mind by thinking about something else, only that something else just made him feel even worse for being there. He started to wonder what his friends were doing.

He took out his cell phone from his pocket and brought up the list of his contacts with Broflovski being one of the top shown.

"Stan?" Kyle's voice rang into his ear once he had dialed the number and it made him smile and relax, forgetting where he was for a few seconds.

"Kyle, hey."

"Stan, where did you go dude?"

Stan paused, he was about to answer Kyle's question when he looked down in his hand at the pink DVD the girls had all just rented and sighed.

"…My parents need me at home, chores and stuff."

There was a pause from Kyle that seemed to go on forever leaving Stan tense all over as he waited for a response, hoping his super best friend would believe him.

"Weak." He finally replied.

"Right? Where are you?" Stan said relieved.

"Oh you're not going to believe this Stan…" Kyle started however Stan lost interest.

Not because Kyle's story was boring but because most of his attention was drawn to something on the wall in front of him.

It was the same poster that he saw in the video store. Butters was there again with two eye patches covering both his eyes and the same writing as before about cookies for $1.

Stan's mind had been distracted earlier by the girl's insufferable screeching and jumping so he failed to make the connection between Butters being blind and the $1 cookie offer.

The connection he now had however gave Stan a horrifying thought that danced about in his mind. He tried to shake it off but when he looked to his right and saw a fairly large crowd gathering he found himself piecing things together that he wasn't sure he wanted to. He realized he was standing at the North entrance, where the poster said Butters was…blind Butters.

He turned and, half listening to Kyle, he started to walk slowly towards the crowd.

Lucky for him Kyle had only just finished talking about whatever it was he was talking about and was now waiting expectantly for a reply.

"So, Cartman's not with you?" Stan said with a tone of deep worry that Kyle picked up immediately.

"Cartman?" Kyle questioned confused.

"Stan!" Came an angry voice from the crowd and he turned sharply towards it to find the fatass marching his way towards him throwing his flabby arms around by his sides.

"Cartman?" Stan shouted shocked.

"Is that Cartman?" Kyle called down the phone.

"Stan, what the hell? Where did you go before?" Carman shouted down his other ear.

"Yeah dude, hang on." Stan said into his phone to Kyle and then turned back to

Cartman. "Cartman, what the hell is all this? Did I see a poster before for Butters being blind?"

"Alright Stan, let me lay something down here." Cartman said snatching his phone off him and hanging up.

"Hey!"

"Listen, I don't want to hear any of your hippie crap about this being immoral, cheating or wrong I'm doing it, you can't stop me." He said and smacked the phone back down into Stan's hand.

"Doing what? Have you-have you blinded Butters?" Stan cried.

"What? No! Butters is fine! Just don't tell anyone that, you got it?"

Stan looked at him with one eyebrow up and leant to see past him at the crowd of people and then back to Cartman's infuriated face.

"We clear?" Cartman asked again.

Stan remained looking at him with utter confusion but then looked down at his watch and his eyes shot open. "Whatever dude, I've got to go!"He said and turned with a face of panic and ran back.

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><p><strong>A.N: Read on to find out what happens to Stan in the rest of his day!<strong>


	2. Chapter 2Stan2

Stan ran to the shoe shop hoping Wendy wouldn't be gone thinking he had ditched her. He didn't want to imagine the possibility that this whole torturing afternoon might've been a complete waste of time! By the time he was there he was panting from running and some of his hair had escaped messily from his hat.

"Hi Stan." Wendy said cheerily to him with a smile and Stan stopped panting and started breathing heavily through his nose.

"I'm not late?"

"Only by a couple of minutes. And the girls and I decided not to go in _this_ shoe shop anyway." Wendy said pointing behind her at the shop with a face like it housed a million cockroaches.

"Yeah, we normally do our shopping next door. We only went in to see what it was like." Bebe laughed and the girls joined in like they were purposely laughing at the shop outside it so the owners could see.

Stan looked to the shop next door to that one and thought that the one the girls were laughing at looked no different to their usual. They were both pink, bright and sparkly with millions of overly priced, bright, heeled shoes, but he figured he shouldn't mention his opinion.

"Stan, we were thinking of getting our haircut…need a trim?" Wendy smiled.

Stan put his hand to his hat and rubbed it over his head feeling the tangled knots of his black scruffy hair.

"Oh no thanks, I think it was cut a few months ago." Stan smiled and the girls giggled.

"Oh Stan!" Wendy sighed like a cheesy 1940's film actress and pulled him away with the rest of the girls still giggling to themselves.

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><p>On the way to the hairdressers one of the girls, Sally, got a phone call.<p>

"Hello?" She said cheerily with a beaming smile to match, shame her caller couldn't see it.

"Yes, this is she." She continued with her smile.

The rest of the group didn't even notice she was on her phone and they continued to chat amongst themselves.

Stan could pick up every time any one of them squealed their high pitch laugh even when he wasn't in their conversation…it wasn't hard.

Therefore no one noticed Sally's cheery smile drop or her raised shoulders fall. Her face looked confused with a mixture of sad and angry, mostly sad.

"What?" She said slowly like she couldn't believe what she was hearing.

It was when she said this that suddenly, in unison, all the girl's heads turned sharply to her.

"Who-who is this?" Sally said with tears welling up in her eyes.

The girls then became very interested and walked towards her with faces of curiosity and sympathy. If Stan wasn't still so interested in the fact that the girls turned to her so sharply and all at once like they had super upset girl detectors he would also be interested in what was wrong.

"Who told you that?" Sally continued and it was now obvious that she was crying and tears were slowly rolling down her cheeks.

The girls closed in on their friend to hold her hand or look her in the eye with care and after another short pause Sally burst into tears dropping her phone from her hand as she threw her arms around Wendy's neck and collapsed onto her, the rest of the girls huddled towards her and patted her back.

"Sally what's wrong?" They all cried sympathetically to her.

"Someone on the phone just told me I was ugly…and that no one likes me." Sally said through sharp intakes of breath and then began to cry again.

"Oh that's not true Sally!"

"Yeah, we like you!"

Stan looked at them with confusion. "Why didn't you just insult them back?" He blurted out but immediately regretted it as all the girls but Sally and Wendy gave him murderous looks like grizzly bears protecting their cub. Stan knew they would kill him if he got any closer.

"What?" Bebe questioned threateningly.

Stan decided to tread lightly with his words for fear of his life "Well…whenever someone insults me or my friends we just, you know, insult them back."

"Insult them back? Stan this was a complete stranger." Another girl said with narrowed eyes.

"Right, so why take such offence?"

Wendy looked at him with deep worry as if to tell him she couldn't control what happens next.

"How would you like it Stan, if someone who doesn't even know you said hurtful things!"

Stan looked around him and noticed the girls were now moving away from comforting Sally and were focusing more on moving menacingly towards him.

"Actually…tha-that's happened to me plenty of times…"

"Really?"

"Yeah…I mean I'm just saying, no biggy"

"Well that's great for you isn't it Stan-"

"Not really." He interrupted.

"BUT for people like Sally, who are nice and generally have no quarrel with anyone or don't have a reputation for being a weirdo, a random person judging them isn't that great." Bebe said through gritted teeth and Stan found himself actually stepping backwards. "Try to imagine it." She smiled sarcastically and took Sally back into her arms. "Come on let's get a new style for your hair, that'll cheer you up!"

Sally smiled up at her and the girls cheered and skipped away leaving Stan to wipe the fake sweat from his forehead in front of Wendy and the two of them walked quickly to catch up with the rest.

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><p>Outside the hairdressers the girls were acting normal with him again with the same beaming smiles, giddy jumps and high-pitched noises but Stan now learned to watch them closely.<p>

He looked up at the name of the hairdressers', which was written in bold letters above him.

"Girls have it their way!"

Stan sighed heavily and rubbed the bridge of his nose.

"Oh no don't worry Stan!" One girl said when she noticed his reaction.

"Yeah this place is for boys too!" Another smiled and they all ran inside screaming and laughing.

Stan looked around him to make sure no one he recognized was watching him and then he slowly took a few small shuffling steps until he was inside.

"Hello girls!" Called a tanned man at the counter a little too happily with the same beaming smile the girls had had on all day.

"Hi James!" They all cheered.

"Here to look fabulous?"

The girls giggled excitedly at the man with the thick combed blonde hair and loosely hanging shirt which tucked into the belt of his tight jeans with half the top buttons undone to reveal his hairless shining chest.

"Oh but who is this!" James said with a face of admiration and awe at Stan who immediately froze. "Oh my, sir, are you here to have your hair done too?"

Stan didn't answer, he hated being the centre of attention and right now everyone in the shop was looking at him with the same face of awe.

"Yes James, he's with us." Wendy answered for him and smiled up at the man.

James stood out from behind the counter and knelt down to the girls.

"Well then you know what this means." He whispered to them and Stan suddenly felt very uncomfortable, his something-bad-is-going-to-happen senses were tingling, they've been doing that a lot lately.

"First boy ever!" James shouted and pulled on a cord that let lose a bundle of blue balloons and confetti that fluttered down everywhere in the shop accompanied by blasting celebration music.

Everyone in the shop suddenly started applauding and the employees shook each other's hands with pride as the music played loud in and out of the shop so everyone passing could here.

"Oh no." Stan muttered.

James then grabbed a microphone and stood outside his shop to alert everyone on the top floor and deafen all who were close.

"Hey happy-go-shoppers! Exciting news here at 'Girls have it their way!' Our first ever male customer has just walked into the shop and wants his hair done too!"

The people around the shop looked at him in surprise but then smiled broadly and poked their heads around to see Stan who was desperately trying to pull his hat down over his face. Those people then began to call their friends and reel in others close by and soon enough a hysterical and entertained crowd had gathered.

James calmly walked back inside with a smug happy face and bent down to Stan.

"So what can we do for you today little man?" He said patronizingly.

Stan looked around him at the crowd of laughing people outside with phones and cameras, flashing and pointing at him, the girls and Wendy smiling at him excitedly and the other female customers giggled with their hairdressers. Outside the crowd was getting even bigger and looking at James smiling down at him made him really begin to wish he was anywhere but there yet somehow he managed to say:

"Um…a trim?"

"A trim!" James repeated in a loud call to those outside who cheered and then continued to film and point.

By the time Stan and the girls were seated most of the people from outside had left, leaving the odd tourist group taking pictures of him with one of them at the window smiling and holding their thumbs up.

Stan looked across at Wendy and the girls chatting away to their stylist or reading a magazine but James insisted on doing Stan's hair and he was finishing off another customer.

I need something to get me out of this. Stan thought. Going in girly shops, buying girly DVDs and dealing with girly problems was bad enough but now being humiliated in front of a whole crowd of people pushed him too far and he wouldn't be surprised if someone from school was in his audience. He would get it on Monday.

Once again he pulled out his phone and scrolled down his list of contacts until he reached McCormick.

Please pick up Kenny! He thought as he pressed the button to dial and held the phone tightly to his ear.

"Hello?" Kenny's muffled voice rang out.

"Kenny, dude! You picked up!" Stan said and for the first time all day a huge beaming smile as wide as the girls' spread across his face as he relaxed his grip on the phone.

"Yeah, it's my turn to have the family cell phone today."

"Yeah yeah, some joke about you being poor, just listen Kenny I need your help!"

"My help?"

"Yeah, I've just been completely humiliated by a load of girls and a gay guy and now I really need you to come and get me out of something."

"Humiliated huh?" Kenny said and Stan could tell he was sniggering and wanting to know more.

"Yes but that doesn't matter! I need you to get to 'Girls have it their way!' now!"

"The girl's hairdressers?"

"Yeah, well turns out it isn't just for girls."

"Really? I thought…oh no Stan, you're not."

"Yeah yeah shut up, make an excuse and come and get me out of this quick!"

"Alright alright I'm on my way." Kenny muffled and the low hum of the dial tone echoed in Stan's ears. Finally someone could take him away.

Stan waited nervously for Kenny to arrive whilst twiddling his thumbs and messing with a loose thread on his coat the hairdresser put on. All the while he was constantly turning his head and watching over his shoulder for James.

"Come on Kenny, where are you?" Stan muttered nervously and began to shake his leg with nerves.

It wasn't long before Stan's worst nightmare appeared behind him with the smell of fake tan and hairspray holding a pair of scissors in his hands.

"Alright little man if you'd just like to take your hat off we can get started." James smiled at him in the mirror.

Stan didn't and looked to the door waiting for Kenny to burst through and save him any minute.

"Little man?"

"Urm…you know I don't think my hair needs doing today actually." Stan stammered.

"Stan." Wendy said in a gentle voice next to him.

He made the mistake of turning to her to see her disappointed face staring at him. Stan stopped shaking and fell into her trap by staring at her cute and innocent face, a face he would surely not disappoint?

"So shall we say about an inch off the top?" James smiled.

* * *

><p>When they were let out of the hairdressers Stan immediately shoved his hat firmly down onto his head. His hair was a lot shorter and he couldn't feel the scruffy wisps hanging on his forehead, or getting in his eyes…he didn't like it.<p>

"Thanks James!" The girls called in unison; they had probably done it that way many times before.

"Well don't we all look…fabulous!" One of the girls shouted and all the girls shrieked in agreement.

"Ooh but you know what would make us feel even better? Make-over at my house!" Wendy shouted and the girls all shrieked to a pitch so high Stan was surprised he could hear it.

"You ok Stan?" Wendy smiled at him.

Stan was in a world of his own, concentrating on the misery he was feeling and the uncomfortable neatness on his head that he used to call his hair. He clicked out of it for a second when he saw Wendy's smiling face.

"Yeah, fine." He smiled weakly back.

"Hooray!" The girls giggled and they all began to walk to the exit to meet with Wendy's parents with Stan dragging his feet slowly behind.

They were on the first floor at the hairdressers and the way out led them over a huge food hall. On the far wall of this food hall was a large TV screen about half the size of the ones they have in cinemas. Only on this one, there were lots of short cheesy clips repeatedly advertising different shops in the mall; it was the mall's own channel so nothing else played.

The girls stood on the balcony looking over the food hall and began to talk amongst themselves whilst waiting for Wendy's parents. Stan crossed his arms, leant them on the ledge and dropped his head into them in defeat.

"God dam you Kenny." He muttered.

Suddenly something appeared on the screen that made Stan's eyes shoot open and look sharply to the TV screen.

Butters was standing in front of a cheap looking stand with eye patches over both his eyes like they were on his posters.

Stan slowly raised his head, concentrating hard on the screen thinking he might finally get some answers.

Not surprisingly the next to appear on the screen was Cartman after the cameraman zoomed out from Butters' face. His hand was on Butters' shoulder and his head was down.

"Hello, my name is Eric Cartman." Cartman said slowly raising his head to the camera. "And with me here is Butters Stotch. A young innocent boy who has already written the first chapter of his life, and I've read this chapter; it's a story that hit me…hit me right here." Cartman said tapping his chest with his fist and acting like he was welling up. "Butters was born with a disease called being blind; his parents never loved him but…"

As Cartman continued Stan looked hard at the screen with a look of utter confusion frozen onto his face, frowning.

"Butters doesn't want you to cry for him…" Cartman continued. "…or to wrap your arms around him. Butters wants to see and to do that he needs your mone…your help. So please, we're on the ground floor of the mall just before the entrance." Cartman said now pointing out the stand and Butters stood tapping his thumbs together with nerves.

"Oh God Cartman what are you doing?" Stan said to himself.

"We all have the gift of sight, its time we did some sharing." Cartman finished and held out a cookie to Butters who didn't see it so continued to look at the camera and gave a beaming smile.

Stan remained looking up at the screen with a blank face and he would have thought about it a lot more if Wendy and the girls hadn't called him over causing his thoughts to be distracted on more important things.

This was the part he was really dreading…going to a sleepover at a girl's house. His stomach began to do flips at the thought of it and he started to knock his thumbs together like Butters does.

It was going to be a long night.


	3. Chapter 3 Stan3

Stan sat on the floor of Wendy's pink bedroom with the girls. His was the only face without a broad smile or shining eyes and he was the only one not laughing, giggling or fidgeting on the spot in excitement. No, he was just sitting and watching with his head in his hands and his eyelids half closed in boredom, threatening to close fully.

"Ok Wendy, what colour?" Bebe smiled holding up two nail varnish bottles.

"Red!" Wendy said after looking at the two.

The girls giggled again and Stan began to wonder what the hell had been so funny all day?

Bebe moved closer to Wendy and she held out her fingers in front of her for Bebe to gently spread the polish on, by now the room stank of the stuff.

Other girls in the room were also spreading mascara and patting blusher onto each other's faces leaving Stan to sit and happily watch them, or as he called it, sitting in the corner with his arms crossed and his back hunched, slowly going mad with the sound of constant giggling and high pitch squealing whilst remaining completely motionless staring at a small damp spot he noticed on the wall. He dreaded to think about what would come out of tonight or what he would see or what he would have to do…

He was so lost in his terrifying fictional nightmare that he didn't realize the even worse reality was slowly making their way towards him smiling and giggling cheekily.

He managed to snap out of the trance just in time to see all the girls surrounding him all holding separate make-up tools of torture.

"What the-?" He just managed to shriek before the girls he didn't notice behind him grabbed his arms and held him down. "What are you doing?"

"Oh come on Stan, a make-over always makes us feel better." Wendy smiled turning the bottom of the lipstick so the stick slowly rose up.

"WHAT?"

"We promise we won't make you look like a girl!"

"Get him!" The girls laughed and began to paint his face in bright greens, purples and pinks.

Stan tried to resist but moving his head too much would mean a mascara brush would land in his eye or a lipstick stick would slide into his cheekbones. All he could do was shut his eyes tight and try to get back to his imagined nightmare (which was far better than this!) whilst the glossy, sticky, wet and powdery mess was spread all over his face.

Once they were finished the girls stood back and looked at Stan with his eyes tightly shut and his face scrunched up. When he released his tensed face and slowly opened one eye they all began to laugh hysterically and some even fell back on the floor clutching their stomachs and wiping tears from their eyes.

Stan knew this horror would come tonight but he wasn't ready, he didn't know what to expect, how could he have done? He crawled frantically to the middle of the girl's circle and snatched up the mirror off the floor.

His face was glowing with sparkles and a bright pink tone, with bright green eyelids and blood red lips and his eyelashes were thick and black.

He grabbed his sleeve and slid his hand down it giving him something to wipe his face with but just before he could do it Wendy shouted him.

"Oh come on Stan we're only having a bit of fun." She moaned and walked towards him. "I didn't mean to upset you."

She reached for his hands making him drop the mirror and pulled him up to his feet.

"I'm only trying to get you to join in." She smiled and swayed his hands from side to side with hers.

Stan could feel himself weakening and he really tried to fight it but the thought of her being unhappy with him made him feel even weaker so he smiled at her, holding back the screams of shame and embarrassment.

The next activity Stan made sure he joined in with so he wouldn't be caught out by another surprise attack.

Truth or dare.

They all sat in a circle and sometimes Stan even attempted to copy their pathetic little giggles whenever they did them, just to seem like he was fitting in so they didn't feel the need to make him 'happy' but he had no idea what they were laughing at.

"Alright Amy, truth or dare?" Wendy asked one of the girls.

"Truth!"

"Okay." Wendy thought. "If we were all burning in a house fire, which one of us would you save?"

"Oh no!" Amy sighed with a smile making Stan think she wasn't taking it as seriously as the girls would like. "Oh no I can't decide!" She said with her hands to her cheeks.

"Ah, no, you have to!" Wendy smiled and the girls whined similar things.

"It's really hard!"

"Well where did the fire start?" Stan asked. "Depending on whose room it's closest to you should try and save them first. Leave the others to make their own way out since they have more of a chance, that makes it fair right?" Stan said once again speaking his mind but again the girls turned on him sharply, their beaming smiles dropping and wide eyes narrowing.

"Well…I mean if you can't pick…we can just…hurry this up a bit…" Stan stammered and Wendy gave him the same anxious face as before, biting her lip.

The girls continued to look at him hard and Stan realized that he hadn't quite gotten the point of the game; it was obviously not to find the most logical way out of a fire.

"I mean…I'm joking of course I'm joking!" Stan cheered with an over exaggerated smile hiding his terrified nerves.

The girls paused a while, confused at his strangeness, but then laughed with him. Stan laughed loudly until the girls finally looked away from him and he sighed heavily and wiped his brow.

He was so relieved that the girls didn't rip him to shreds that he didn't realize they were beginning to mutter amongst themselves again until Bebe turned back to him.

"Okay Stan you're turn!"

"Me? No really-"

"Truth or dare?"

Stan looked around the circle at the expectant faces and the thought of upsetting them again made his heart stop for a second. "Dare?"

Bebe smiled and the girls whispered amongst themselves. In the agonizing wait whilst Stan was wondering to himself why the hell he picked dare, he thought of what Chef had said to him a while ago about playing truth or dare. He sudden felt a little less tense and a little more excited. Chef said something about saying truth a few times first, well it was too late for that as he had to think of the first thing that came to his head before the girls thought he was being awkward again.

He had Chef's soothing voice echoing around his mind: "They're women, they've had this whole thing planned out months ahead of time."

That got Stan even more excited, could this be the whole reason for this agonising day? Maybe all the girls were in on it and Wendy went and found him this morning all for this moment, right now.

"Okay." Bebe said turning to him again whilst the rest of the girls sat and stared at him with mischievous smiles, waiting for Bebe to reveal the dare.

"We dare you…"

Yes…Stan thought.

"We dare you to…"

Yes...

"Kiss Wendy on the lips!" She squealed and all the girls giggled hysterically and some fell onto their backs again.

Stan looked over to Wendy who smiled at him. After all that had happened to him on this painful day, of all the hell and embarrassment he had been through, who would've thought that something good would come from it in the end! Something worthwhile! Something he actually wanted to do!

His heart began to pound in his chest like it was trying to escape as Wendy slid closer to him. She gently moved her hair behind her ear and looked up to him causing the butterflies in Stan's stomach to be set loose.

Time began to slow and Stan couldn't think of anything but Wendy. The temptation to throw up was getting worse and worse but he did all he could to keep it down, he couldn't bear any more embarrassment.

And just as their lips were about to touch Wendy's father burst into the room.

"Wendy!" He shouted angrily and in fear of thinking he had come in because he had seen them, Wendy jumped back from Stan.

"Wendy come quick, we're all going back to the mall!" He boomed

"The mall, why?"

"Because we have been cheated that's why! And we need to get our money back, no time to explain fully! You all come too girls." He shouted taking Stan as one of them, and ran out of the door leaving it open for everyone to follow and they all hurried out leaving Stan sitting alone in the middle of the room.

"Really?"

* * *

><p>Wendy's parents drove quickly back to the mall, refusing to answer any of their questions until they were there. All they would say is that someone there had ripped them off so all the kids could do was grip onto the sides of the car and onto each other as they were thrown violently around and on top of each other as the car flew around corners.<p>

Once the car pulled up at the mall Stan looked out the window to find there was a large crowd moving in the same direction out of the mall but he couldn't see what towards. They moved slowly and menacingly towards something, all with growling faces of anger and fury, they were more like an angry mob, quite common for this time of year in South Park.

They were all unloaded out of the car but left to their own devices as the parents marched away furiously to join the angry mob, with Wendy's dad rolling his sleeves up as he did.

"What's going on?" One of the girls asked.

"I don't know. Let's go look." Wendy replied and they all moved slowly towards the angered crowd.

They were only able to stand at the outsides of the crowd as getting any further would mean pushing through the tightly packed bodies and that looked too dangerous.

Whoever they were after, they were in deep shit. Stan thought.

As Stan tried to look further into the crowd between all the feet he saw a flash of orange that he was sure he recognized and when he looked closer he knew he was right.

"Kenny!" He tried to shout over the angered ramblings, but he wasn't heard.

"Kenny!" He shouted again but again Kenny didn't reply.

"I'll be back in a minute!" Stan said turning to Wendy and then ducked his head, covering it with his hands, and pushed his way into the crowd leaving Wendy's frightful cries to call him back behind him.

"Kenny!" He called again after pushing his way a little further through the kicking and stomping feet so he was a lot closer.

This time Kenny heard him and he turned to face him, making Stan a little more relieved. Only, seconds later the crowd fell silent and, after few more seconds, Kenny had a bullet hole through his head after the defining roar of a gun shot hit the silence.

"Omg!" Stan shouted in horror watching his dead friend collapse to the floor in a pool of blood. "They killed Kenny!"

"You bastards!" Came an unexpected cry from the other side of the crowd.

Stan stood straight like a meerkat homing in on an interesting sound and he turned his head in the direction he heard the call.

"Kyle?" He called but after no reply he ducked down once again and covered his head to move through the crowd.

"Kyle?" He called again and this time he got a reply.

"Stan!"

"Kyle!" Stan said with a smile when Kyle appeared in front of him doing exactly the same thing with his hands and ducking his head. "Dude, what's going on?"

Kyle didn't reply and just scrunched up his face in confusion at him and Stan began to get aggravated with the silence. "Dude?"

Kyle remained staring at him like he was from another planet and then finally gestured his hand in front of his face to indicate what was wrong with his.

"Dude, you…you do know you're covered in make-up?"

Stan's eyes shot open and this time he had no hesitation in pulling his sleeve over his hand and rubbing the make-up from his face, leaving a colourful stain on his jacket sleeve. His face went bright pink again, this time from embarrassment, but he didn't bother to explain anything to Kyle.

"Wh-what's going on then?" He said stumbling over his words.

"It's Cartman dude!" Kyle continued still a little taken back. "The fatass did something stupid again and he's dragged Butters into it as well but this time he's gonna pay! I think they're at the front!" Kyle called over the ramblings that had started up again and were getting louder.

"I should've known." Stan looked up and around him at the faces of the angry mob and how sinister they looked.

"Alright, let's go."

**A/N: So that's Stan's side of the story! And now there are many questions and events unanswered!**

**So, want to know what happens to everyone at the end?**

**What on Earth Cartman was up to?**

**What Kyle, Cartman and Kenny were talking about when Stan looked back to them?**

**Who shouted Goddamn it in the video store?**

**Why the queue in the video store was held up?**

**What Kyle was doing when he rang him?**

**Who prank called Sally?**

**Why didn't Kenny show up to help him?**

**Why Cartman and Butters were on the TV screen?**

**Why Wendy's parents drove them all back to the mall?**

**WHO SHOT KENNY? And why?**

**And how did Kyle get to the crowd?**

**...Then read what happens next in Cartman's story!**

**Watch this space! **


	4. Chapter 4 Cartman1

A/N: Now its Cartman's side of the story! Starting off, of course, in the same place as Stan…

Cartman's day

The day started pretty normally. Cartman was out with Stan, Kyle and Kenny on another moneymaking scheme, the one that works best with children their age, selling cookies door to door.

As successful as he had heard it normally is, Cartman was beginning to think that it only worked on girl scouts or children younger and cuter than them as they weren't getting many sales just violently shut doors, inches from their faces.

"This is pointless Cartman!" Kyle moaned as they walked away from yet another door that had slammed in their faces.

"We've not been out long enough Kahl!" Cartman said waddling angrily from the door. "Give it time!"

Once at the bottom of the garden Stan leant back against the garden fence of the house they had just been rejected from. Kenny and Kyle joined him rubbing their aching feet. Cartman however stayed standing, refusing to give in, and he looked around him for their next possible target.

Just as he was doing that he noticed something that made his eyes narrow and sharply turn back to the others and shush them with his finger against his lips. The three looked at him with confusion but remained silent and followed his concentrated gaze until it landed on a young boy and his mother knocking on the door of the house next to the one they were standing outside of.

The boy was younger than them but only by a few years and he had a beaming smile and soft brown hair and his mother looked like the kind and gentle type that every son dreamed of and she was looking down at him with her hand on his back and a huge smile of pride on her face.

It made Cartman sick. He knew exactly what they were doing as his eyes were immediately drawn to the wad of cash in the mother's other hand and the innocent box of homemade cookies in the arms of the son.

The four boys watched in anticipation as the house owner that had slammed the door in their face answered to this young and sweet child and his darling mother. They couldn't hear what was said, or what they were laughing at, but they could tell that the house owner said "Aww" to the young boy after he stretched out his arms and held the box of cookies up. And then they noticed the house owner pass over a few dollars and take a couple of cookies from the child.

Stan, Kenny and Kyle joined Cartman in staring at the child with a dumbfounded and slightly angered expression.

"De fuck?" Cartman said barely moving his face.

"Dude, he just got a sale! What gives?" Stan agreed.

"What a piss-take!" Kenny muffled.

The boys watched as the child beamed up at his mother and she placed the money handed to her into her purse. Then, as they began to walk back down the path, the mother took hold of her son's arm very carefully and the closed eyes on the boy, that the four thought were part of the animated beaming smile, remained permanently closed as he walked towards them.

Suddenly the observers felt a little guilty and they stopped staring. They kept their heads low as the child skipped merrily past them clutching onto his mother's hand tightly, both of them smiling.

"Poor kid." Kyle said softly as they watched the blind boy knock on the next door.

"Poor kid? Poor kid? Kahl did you see that wad of cash!" Cartman blurted and the others looked at him in disgust.

"Yeah poor kid! I can't imagine anything worse than being blind!" Kyle replied.

"Being poor and blind; but we know that's not the case with these dirty thieves."

The three stood with wide eyes and gaping jaws, looking at Cartman. Kyle was about to say something else when a shout from someone behind them interrupted him.

"Stan!"

They all turned around to see Wendy looking at him and beckoning him towards her.

"Wendy?" Stan shouted questioning her appearance.

"Can I talk to you a minute?"

Stan looked back at the guys who rolled their eyes. "It'll only take a minute." He said guiltily and walked towards Wendy.

"Stan no! You have to help with my plan! Stan! God dam it." Cartman shouted and then muttered defeated.

Kyle and Kenny turned back to Cartman after watching Stan walk away.

"Dam chicks, they're always ruining things for us guys. Always have done as well! Even Superman was dragged everywhere by Lois Lane, and Mary Jane distracted Spiderman from his duties!"

"What the hell are you talking about Cartman?" Kyle said.

"Not to mention Rachael Dawes!" Kenny added.

"Rachael Dawes?" Kyle questioned turning to Kenny in confusion.

"Rachael Dawes, you know Batman's girl." Kenny reminded him.

"Batman doesn't have a girl." Kyle said and instantly regretted it as Cartman and Kenny gave him shocked and suspicious looks.

"Um…yeah he does Kahl, you know like in the two films Batman Begins and The Dark Knight." Cartman said slowly.

"Oh, oh right." Kyle said, still not entirely sure.

There was another silence as Kenny and Cartman exchanged glances.

"Kahl, you have seen the Dark Knight haven't you?"

Kyle's eyes flipped between Cartman and Kenny's anticipating faces and then he looked down at his feet and bit his lip.

"No! No Kahl!" Cartman immediately burst out. "You haven't seen the Dark Knight?"

"Alright so I haven't so what!" Kyle said defensively and Cartman and Kenny flung their arms in the air and sighed dramatically.

"What?"

"Kahl if you haven't seen the Dark Knight you haven't completed the checklist!" Cartman said looking at him desperately like he had betrayed them. Kyle returned the favour by looking at him like he was speaking a foreign language.

"What checklist?"

"It's from a book called The Dude in you." Kenny started, and Kyle was thankful he was talking to someone he could probably get some sense out of. "It has a checklist in it made for kids our age that we have all managed to tick every box in."

Kyle looked between the two confused as to why this was so important to them.

"Basically Kahl, if you haven't ticked everything in this book then you're not the guy we thought you were."

Kyle paused for a minute and then looked at the two in shock slightly hurt.

"You mean, if I haven't completed this checklist I won't be able to hang out with you guys anymore?"

As Kyle looked at him, Kenny rolled his eyes down and shuffled his feet to try and avoid the awkward hurt looks he was getting but Cartman just stared back at him.

"Alright! Fine! Gimmie this checklist!" Kyle roared.

Cartman slowly reached into his bag and pulled out a book with a picture of the Fonz with his thumbs up on the front cover and a title above him saying The Dude in you. He held it out to Kyle who looked at him and placed his hand on the book to take it away but Cartman pulled it back just before he could.

"I warn you Kahl, you're not going to like some of the stuff in here."

Kyle looked at him threateningly through narrowed eyes and ignored him, snatching the book from his hands and began to march away.

"Hey Kahl." Cartman shouted back making Kyle stop and turn back to him. "Every last box." He said menacingly and smiled a smile that Kyle recognized all too well but he ignored it and continued walking away.

This was brilliant. There's no way Kahl would be able to complete every box in there! Some things are against his pointless code of righteousness. He thinks he'll be saved from hell by following his head? Go to happy little Jew heaven? No chance, he's a Jew! No Jews get through the pearly gates. So when he finds he can't complete the list he'll be kicked out of the group, Stan will cry and I will laugh. No doubt Kyle will cry too, and I'll just laugh at him as well! Right in his face whilst he cries all the way home to mommy. Oh what would I give to see him cry?

When Kyle was out of sight Kenny and Cartman turned back to Stan and Wendy to find they too had left.

"God dam hippy!" Cartman mumbled angrily "Looks like it's you and me Kenny." He said reaching into his bag.

Kenny didn't like the sound of that. Cartman's plans were always either a little over the top or well past the boundaries of downright illegal and if they got into trouble for it he wouldn't hesitate to pass the blame.

He watched Cartman suspiciously as he continued to rummage through to the bottom of his bag.

"What's the plan?" Kenny said slightly nervous and not entirely sure he really wanted the answer.

"We'll just play that blind kid at his own game. If people won't respond to my cute daintiness…" Kenny scoffed interrupting him and Cartman gave him a threatening look. "…then we'll have to get their sympathy another way." And with that he finally found what he was rummaging for.

"Play the blind kid at his…?" Kenny started but couldn't finish as his eyes widened and he stared in shock at what Cartman pulled out of his bag.

Two eye patches.

"No Cartman! I am not pretending to be blind!" Kenny protested.

"Oh come on Kenny! This way we're sure to get the money! Think of the money you need for your family you poor piece of crap, don't be so selfish!"

Kenny scrunched his nose up in anger "You wouldn't split it evenly with me anyway you asshole!"

"Sure I would, now put them on before someone sees you seeing things!"

Cartman held the eye patches out to Kenny who didn't take them and continued looking up at Cartman. "Why don't you wear them?"

Cartman rolled his eyes like he was talking to an annoying child but kept his hands out. "Because dumbass I pull stuff like this all the time some people might think I'm faking."

"You are faking."

"That's not the point! Now put them on!"

"No!"

"God dam it Kenny!"

Kenny smacked his hand up at Cartman's causing the eye patches to fly out of his hands.

"Ey!" Cartman squawked and ran to pick up the patches from the snow. He lifted them out of the small hole they made and brushed off the few snowflakes that hadn't melted. He then turned back to Kenny to find he was walking away.

"Kenny you asshole! You're family isn't going to eat tonight because of you!"

Kenny ignored him and remained walking away but raised his hand behind his back to give a one-finger gesture.

"God dam it." Cartman muttered and picked up his bag of cookies and began walking down the street following the same path as the blind boy.

"Where am I going to find someone who looks convincing enough to be a blind kid?" He muttered whilst rubbing the eye patches in his hands with his thumbs, looking down at them as he thought.

Just then he heard footsteps crunching in the snow but, thinking it was just the blind kid on his way back to mock him, he didn't look up until he recognized a weak crying whimper that could belong to only one of his friends.

Butters was walking towards Cartman with his hand against his eye and the other eye scrunched up as he was crying. His other hand was stretched out and feeling along the fences of the gardens to guide his way and make sure he didn't stray onto the road.

"Butters?" Cartman questioned quietly like he didn't believe what he was seeing.

Butters didn't hear him and continued to whimper, slowly making his way towards him.

"Butters!" Cartman said louder and this made Butters stop in his tracks and hold his hand out to feel for him.

"Eric?"

"Butters what the hell?"

"Oh Eric, thank goodness I found someone. It's my eye! It really hurts!" Butters cried.

"You're eye! But Butters that's perfect!"

Butters flickered his other eye open to look at Cartman. "Wh-why?"

Cartman stopped smiling after realizing what he had just said and coughed awkwardly.

"Be-because Butters it just so happens that I have a medical kit on me."

"You do! Well gee thanks Eric."

"Hold still Butters."

Cartman stretched out the eye patch and placed it over Butters' eye and then he placed the second one over the other eye. Then he stood back with his hands on his hips and looked closely at Butters to check how convincing it looked.

"Err…Eric? Not that I'm…doubting your medical expertise but…why do I need two eye patches? My other eye doesn't hurt you know."

Cartman didn't answer for a while and just looked at Butters from different angles as he stood silently and awkwardly fiddling his thumbs.

"Er-eric?"

"Because Butters the infection might spread."

"Infection? Oh jeez."

"Don't worry Butters you're in safe hands, now come on." Cartman said calmly and threw his bag over his shoulder with the cookies inside and grabbed Butters' arm pulling him away.

"Where are we going?"

"To the mall." Cartman smiled.

At the mall Cartman had set up a stand on the ground floor. Butters was sitting behind it on a small plastic chair, still with the eye patches on, and Cartman was walking about in front of the stand with a box of cookies on string around his neck. At the front of the stand was a hand made poster that read:

"Blind boy needs money for freakish scary eye operation, Cookies $1" in messy handwriting.

Butters sat confused twiddling his thumbs as their first customer caught notice of the stand and walked towards Cartman who beamed up at him.

"Blind huh?"

"Yes sir that's right, blind as a bat."

"Blind!" Butters screamed "Oh Jesus no!"

Cartman ignored him and smiled guiltily up at the man who looked at Butters skeptically before looking down again at Cartman angrily.

"Just $1 for a cookie sir." He smiled, already getting a cookie out of the box.

The man just shook his head and walked away making Cartman sigh heavily and walk back grumpily to Butters who was now fidgeting on his seat.

"Blind! Eric what do I do? Should I take something? Oh jeez where's the nearest doctor!" He panicked.

"Would you calm down Butters."

"But I don't wanna be blind Eric! Well I-I'd rather be slapped silly by a monkey than be blind and-and I don't really want to be slapped silly by a monkey." Butters stammered.

"Blindness wears off eventually Butters, Jesus Christ." Cartman lied.

"It-it does?"

"Sure. But we just need some money to help with that. So we're gonna stand and sell cookies, now look adorable and confident but sad and bewildered!" Cartman demanded confusingly and took back the box of cookies to hunt down customers.

This was it. The ultimate foolproof plan, the plan that was going to make him rich! Well richer than all his friends and that's all that mattered. Now when something truly awesome is released, like a new Xbox game or console, and they all asked their parents and they all said no; he would be able to walk into the shop and simply buy it himself! Use it all by himself! And the others would just have to sit and watch him, filling with jealousy.

However it was a while before another customer even looked at the stall. And when they did they didn't seem too interested.

Cartman gave up after a while and sat back down with Butters.

"I just don't get it Butters, we've got the illness we've got the cause, we've got the delicious cookies that my mum baked, you look fairly cute and cuddly. What are we missing?"

Butters turned and looked more or less in Cartman's direction guessing from the sound of his voice.

"Well I've never given to a charity before. Oh except when I sponsored a dog because it was an ex-circus dog! Yeah he had been thrown out onto the street but he could still dance!" Butters giggled and Cartman looked at him like a he was a freak. He rolled his eyes and looked around him for ideas or inspiration; clearly he wasn't going to get it from Butters.

"Oh and there was the guy who had this illness see, and he had survived all through pre-school and elementary school and high school but he just needed money for university." Butters continued.

Cartman's eyes suddenly shot open and he slowly turned to Butters with a smile on his face. "That's it!"

"What? Go to university? Because I don't think I'm old enough yet." Butters said, as he couldn't see Cartman's notorious smile

"No Butters! A simple background story is all we need! A story to drag people in, get people interested, make people _want_ to give us money not feel like they have to! We just need to make up a painful, terrifying, heart-wrenching story full of love and tears!"

Butters began to fidget again as he thought of how he _really_ hurt his eye. "You mean lie?" He stammered.

"Oh yes, lie. Lie the perfect lie. And by the end we'll make people believe that with their help, their money, they can bring the story a happy ending." Cartman smiled evilly to himself.

**A/N: So Butters has once again been dragged into Cartman's plans! Want to know what happens in the rest of Cartman's story?**

**Then watch this space!**


	5. Chapter 5 Cartman2

**A/N: Thank you so much to those who commented! I really appreciate it and it means a hell of a lot to me! Gives me the encouragement to continue!**

**So lets continue with Cartman's story…**

"Yes that's right ma'am, but when he finally found his dog, his only friend, was in a very weak state." Cartman spoke softly to a middle-aged woman in the mall just outside his stand. Other wandering shoppers who stopped to listen to Butters' dreadful tale of woe joined her.

"Oh how truly awful!"

"And you know the worst part, the dog didn't survive. His only friend in the world is now no longer here. But he confided into him one last request…that Butters see again. So he could see first hand that the world was not as bad as he thought and experienced, that there is always a shimmer of light! Something to hold onto...believe in." Cartman said with dramatic emotion clenching his fists and resting his head down onto his chest.

A small audience had gathered for the story and now they looked back to Butters with immense sympathy and some even had tears rolling down their cheeks.

"Only $1 a cookie to save his sight!" Cartman said suddenly jolting his head up and immediately arms of the audience shot out before him, the dollars in their hands were loosely held out before being dropped into Cartman's bag and he just about managed to keep up and grab the right amount of cookies and throw them into the hands of his waiting crowd.

Once that group of gullible crowd members dissipated Cartman took a few steps back to Butters at the stand and sat down to count the money.

"Hey Eric?" Butters asked as he heard Cartman pull up a chair and sit next to him. "I have a question. How can I know my dog's last wish if he was, you know…a dog?"

Cartman sighed and stopped flicking the dollars through his fingers. "Because Butters you have a deep and meaningful, 'Doctor Doolittle' type connection I don't know that's not the point, the point is its working and these suckers are buying into your story and giving me…us the money for it."

Butters fidgeted in his seat uncomfortably and twiddled his thumbs before Cartman stuffed the money back into his pocket and stood at the front of the stand again to give the next show.

"Ladies and gentlemen! Please gather around to help a young boy who lost everything; the love from his parents, his only friend and…his sight."

Butters swallowed hard.

A small collection of people began to gather around Cartman as he beckoned them closer and then prepared himself.

"Ladies and gentlemen, we come to you today not just as a charity stand in the mall, not just as a plead for help, but to tell you a story; the story of poor blind Butters Stotch." Cartman began and before long he had yet another small crowd of people looking sympathetically at Butters and paying close attention to Cartman's story.

* * *

><p>"…and so with no love from his parents, brave little Butters entered the dark street on his own to once again find his-" Cartman stopped half way through the story as something caught his eye, something dangerous. "To-to find his…" He tried to continue but he lost his place and was completely distracted by what he saw.<p>

"Yes?" One woman called from the audience. "What happened next?" Another shouted.

Cartman looked back at his audience and tried to focus on them but what was standing just behind them was a bigger concern. "Ladies and gentlemen I will now pass you over to brave little Butters himself, who will continue this story for a short while until I return."

The audience immediately drew their attention to Butters, and if he could see just how many eyes were glaring he would have been shaking more than he already was.

"What?" He stammered.

"Yes he'll do_ fine_." Cartman exaggerated. "He _knows_ the story!" He said before running through the crowd leaving Butters to deal with them.

Cartman was hoping he wouldn't see anyone he, or more importantly Butters, knew at the mall. He thought he'd have a bit of luck since it was a Saturday and most kids are doing more important stuff like playing on the Xbox or out with friends, not being dragged around by their parents. But to find _him_ here, this was bad. He could throw this whole plan out the window.

"Stan!"Cartman shouted when he saw Stan on his phone slowly walking towards the crowd with a confused look on his face.

"Cartman?" Stan said shocked.

"Stan, what the hell? Where did you go before?"

"Yeah dude, hang on." Stan said into his phone and then turned back to Cartman.

"Cartman, what the hell is all this? Did I see a poster before for Butters being blind?"

"Alright Stan, let me lay something down here." Cartman said snatching his phone off him and hanging up

"Hey!"

"Listen, I don't want to hear any of your hippie crap about this being immoral, cheating or wrong I'm doing it, you can't stop me." He said and smacked the phone back down into Stan's hand.

"Doing what? Have you-have you blinded Butters?" Stan cried.

"What? No! Butters is fine! Just don't tell anyone that, you got it?"

Stan looked at him with one eyebrow up and leant to see past him at the crowd of people and then back to Cartman's infuriated face. "We clear?"

Stan remained looking at him with utter confusion but then looked down at his watch and his eyes shot open. "Whatever dude, I've got to go!"He said and turned with a face of panic and ran back.

Cartman watched him go and then made his way back through the now dispersed crowd to the front to find they had all already heard the story, or _a_ story, and were now leaving with watered eyes and pink faces with their money left with Butters at the stand.

Butters himself was talking to a man in a formal suit who was jotting things down on a rough piece of paper as he spoke.

Cartman sat down next to Butters interrupting their conversation and ignoring the smiling gel-haired man.

"Butters, Stan just said something about a poster he's seen in the mall about you?"

Butters turned his head in the direction of Cartman's voice and shrugged, the man next to him looked at Cartman expectantly waiting to be acknowledged.

"Well you must know something! I haven't done it so who has?"

"I have actually." The man said looking at Cartman like he now had the upper hand and Cartman shot him a look of confusion, not only for why he was sitting there, but also for what he had done. "The name's Ted Samson, I'm the owner of this mall."

Cartman sat up straight and held his hand out to him. "Nice to meet you Ted!" He said with a beaming smile and Ted shook his hand firmly.

"I heard your story as I was passing before and thought I would help you, your story touched me deeply."

"Yes yes, it has touched many, but you have made a donation?" Cartman said impatiently.

"Of course but I want to do more. You see around the mall there are advertisement televisions. I can arrange a live interview with Butters here that will be broadcast all over the mall!"

Cartman's eyes grew wide and he smiled broadly.

"All over the mall?" Butters stammered, clearly not as pleased with this as Cartman.

"That's right! Think of all the donations you could get from that kind of advertisement!"

"Oh yes just think." Cartman repeated.

"So are you up for it Butters?"

"Of course he is!" Cartman interrupted.

"Excellent, a camera crew will be down shortly!"

Cartman smiled and waved to Ted as he left their stand but Butters just began to fidget and wave unenthusiastically in the wrong direction.

"Urm Eric? I'm a little nervous about being broadcast everywhere. What if I get it wrong? And everyone will be looking at me!"

"What do you care Butters you can't see what their reaction will be." Cartman answered unsympathetically and got up again to draw the attention of another crowd.

* * *

><p>Once again he told Butters' story of woe about unloving parents, a friendly stray dog that was kicked out and found again only to tell Butters a last wish on his deathbed.<p>

And once again people cried and "awwed" and eventually, and most importantly, handed over the cash.

Cartman was on his way back to the stand whilst counting the dollars between his fingers when someone stopped him.

"Hello? Excuse me?" A young woman called loudly to try and catch Cartman's attention as he was walking away.

"Can I help you?" Cartman said still facing and walking the other way, focusing on his money.

"Urm…yes." The woman said a little surprised about his attitude. "I would like to speak to Butters please, if he's ok with that?"

"And why's that?"

"Well urm…to put it bluntly, I would like to write a book about him."

Cartman stopped, letting himself forget where he was up to with his money, and slowly turned to face her. "What?"

"My name's Angelina I write books about little children's brave stories against the world." She said with a smile, pleased that she now had his full attention.

What is wrong with these people? Cartman thought. Butters is blind! He doesn't need love or attention he needs money!

"Listen lady, he doesn't want to become famous from your words! He wants to live; he wants to see! So either give money or go." Cartman said bluntly and began to walk away again, counting his money from the beginning.

"But I can make everyone hear his cry! Everyone can know his story; his tragic tale of coping with being blind!" Angelina shouted after him.

He won't be blind for long Cartman thought.

* * *

><p>Cartman sat and avoided conversation about the woman with Butters, saying it was for a good reason why he turned her away, and counted all the money they had so far.<p>

"Say Eric, how much money will it take for me not to be blind anymore?"

Cartman rolled his eyes and sighed. "I don't know Butters; we'll just have to wait 'till the end of the day."

"Right, right." Butters said quietly purposely avoiding a long conversation with Cartman as he was counting.

Cartman put the last of the money he had counted into his bag and then heaved himself out of his chair and to the front of the stand once again. However, to his surprise, there were no passers by. An old man was slowly putting one foot in front of the other ahead of them but apart from that there was no one. Cartman looked up at the clock hanging on the wall with the cheesy writing underneath saying: "It's never too late to shop!"

It's still the afternoon. He thought. "Where the hell is everyone!" he said this time calling to anyone who might hear.

"You-you mean no one's there?" Butters stammered.

Cartman ignored him but just as he was about to sit down again he noticed a teenage girl running towards him.

"Hey!" Cartman called. "Where is everyone? Is the mall closing?"

The girl had a huge beaming smile and she was gasping for air either from running or because she hadn't given herself a chance to breathe because she was laughing so hard.

"On the first floor! In the hairdressers "Girls have it their way!" Everyone's there!" She screamed and sped past him.

Cartman watched her go with a confused expression frozen on his face.

"What do you think is going on?" Butters called from behind him after a pause filling the empty space and creating an echo.

"I don't know." Cartman said turning back to Butters. "And I'm not about to find out, we can't leave the stand."

* * *

><p>"Well this sucks!" Cartman called out into the emptiness after sitting silently with Butters twiddling his thumbs.<p>

"It sure does."

"We're losing out on money big time."

"Big time." Butters repeated.

"Think of the money that we could be earning! What's so dam important that everyone in the mall is up in the hairdressers?"

"A-are you asking now or…?"

Cartman rolled his eyes and sank his head into his hands.

"Boys!" Someone suddenly called from the silence making Cartman shoot his head back up.

"Ted!" He cheered and his smile widened when he saw the camera and sound guys following behind him.

"Alright here's our plan boys…" Ted started when he approached them and he explained the whole plan for the shoot.

When they were ready the cameraman stood in front of the stand pointing the camera directly at Butters and the boom mic hovered above Cartman, which reminded him of a flying Mr. Kitty. Then Ted held his hand up and timed 3-2-1 on his fingers.

The shot started on Butters' face and eye patches. It then zoomed out and Cartman was standing next to Butters with his hand on his shoulder and his head down.

"Hello, my name is Eric Cartman." Cartman said slowly raising his head at the camera. "And with me here is Butters Stotch. A young innocent boy who has already written the first chapter of his life, and I've read this chapter; it's a story that hit me…hit me right here." Cartman said tapping his chest with his fist and acting like he was welling up. "Butters was born with a disease called being blind; his parents never loved him but there was one who did. A stray dog he found when his parents kicked him out. Butters doesn't want you to cry for him, or to wrap your arms around him. Butters wants to see and to do that he needs your mone…your help. So please, we're on the ground floor of the mall just in front of the entrance." Cartman said now pointing out the stand whilst Butters stood tapping his thumbs together. "We all have the gift of sight, its time we did some sharing." Cartman finished and held out a cookie to Butters who didn't see it so continued to look at the camera and gave a beaming smile to break the silence.

It was only when the cameraman shouted, "cut" that Cartman realized the amount of people who had stopped once again at his stand to observe what was going on. They were all wiping away tears from their eyes, coming towards him with dollars and holding their hands out to shake Butters'.

"That was fantastic, boys!"Ted cheered as Cartman eagerly took the money from customers.

"It was?" Butters said and smiled up to the voice. "Coz I would sure like to see again!"

Cartman tore money away from the audience and answered more questions with improvised lies from the top of his head and as Ted left with the camera crew more and more people turned up around every corner to see the blind boy with the touching story.

"You did it Butters! You cute goldmine!" Cartman cheered.

The crowd not only gave money but some of them stayed. They were stopping other passers by and informing them of Butters' story. Cartman didn't stop them; hell it made his job a lot easier! Now all he had to do was stand there and collect the money!

These people are treating this thing like a freakin' religion! Cartman thought and told Butters to stand up on their stand where people could see him and after a hesitation he reluctantly did so.

In the money throwing frenzy Cartman noticed someone trying to barge past the crowd who he recognized, and the people he recognized Butters would recognize and that would mean more sympathy and more money.

"Mr. Garrison!" Cartman called to Mr. Garrison who suddenly stopped his fast pace walking, which was practically jogging, and spun around to find the source of the voice.

"Come on then you little bastard! You not finished yet? I will find out who you are you hear me!" Mr. Garrison shouted and continued to spin in circles looking above him and around him for the source of the voice. "You go to hell! You go to hell and you die!" He screamed before marching away.

"What the-?" Cartman muttered confused but ignored it and continued to collect money.

"Hey! Hello?" One man called from the audience and made his way to the front where Cartman acknowledged him quickly and held out his bag for him to put money in.

"Oh of course." The man said politely and dropped a few dollars into the bag but didn't disappear much to Cartman's surprise, and disappointment.

"My name's-"

"I've heard a few names today pal so if you'd kindly make a donation and go."

The man laughed politely and followed Cartman back to the stand squeezing past and in-between people as he did. "You misunderstand me; I'm not here just to make a donation I would like to do more for Butters." He said shouting over people whilst ducking and diving between them and constantly stretching out his neck to find Cartman.

When Cartman sat back down at the stand he began counting his recent collection leaving the man to eventually catch up and stand at the front of the stand expectantly. Butters noticed they had arrived when the stand shook a little with Cartman heaving himself up.

"Ahem." The man coughed for attention and Cartman slowly looked up at him. "This is going to sound really exciting boys so prepare yourselves!" He started but stopped for a dramatic pause. Cartman looked at him with a blank face but Butters was bouncing in his seat.

"Exciting! Oh boy!"

"That's right Butters, I listened to your story and I think it would make the next big Hollywood tear jerker!"

Butters stopped jumping and his mouth hung open but Cartman remained looking up at him like he was nothing special.

Jesus Christ not another one! Since when do directors and authors walk around malls getting their inspiration from the residents of South Park?

"Not interested."

Butters turned to him sharply like his excited heart had just dropped to his feet and the director looked down at him with a puzzled expression.

"But-" He began.

"No."

"I-"

"No."

The director gave up and slowly walked away from the stand with a puzzled expression and his hands in his pockets disappointed.

"I-I guess there was a good reason for that too huh?" Butters stammered disappointedly.

Cartman looked at him and then began counting his money again.

He wants a good reason? I'll give him a good reason, this time tomorrow he won't be f*ckin blind!

**A/N: Thank you to all who are keeping up with the story so far! But of course there is still more to know from Cartman's day!**

**So Cartman was affected by Stan's hairdresser visit! Only he didn't know why or who! Of course there is still more to know so...**

**Watch this space!**


	6. Chapter 6 Cartman3

"I'm here at South Park's mall, where two young friends started their brave journey that has lasted them all day! Butters Stotch, as known by his friends, and Eric Cartman have shared with this town their utterly heart wrenching story and it has touched the lives and the pockets of many."

Cartman was standing with Butters surrounded by a crowd of, what he called; pathetic gullible soul-cleansing seekers when a young woman followed by a camera crew arrived. Her name was Lindsay McQueen and she was a reporter for a never-heard-of channel called the charity channel. She was holding a microphone and the camera followed her as she walked slowly towards Butters and Cartman.

"Hello boys." She smiled and bent down so she was level with them.

"Hello Lindsay." Cartman said in a serious tone like he was being interviewed on the sofa of a professional chat show.

"So, can you tell us what you've been doing here today?" She asked cheerily opposing Cartman's tone but he ignored that and continued.

"Well it may seem like a simple task but getting our voices heard was the most difficult Lindsay." Cartman started and Butters copied his mood by crossing his arms and nodding continually. "Once that was achieved however things really took off and I'm proud to say that we are really close to achieving our goal."

"That's right." Butters said in an attempt at a serious voice.

"Fantastic!" Lindsay cheered like she was talking to three year olds. "So what do you plan to-" Lindsay stopped mid-sentence and reached into her pocket; Cartman looked at her with a puzzled expression. "I am sorry boys, I forgot to turn my phone off." She said embarrassed and bit her lip whilst she pulled out her vibrating phone.

Cartman rolled his eyes as she stood up again with a bright red face.

"Its cool Lindsay we'll just put up the sign for technical difficulties." One of the cameramen whispered to her with exaggerated arm movements. She nodded and put her phone to her ear as the screen went blank for all viewers at home…if there were any.

"Hello? Who is this?" Lindsay said angrily into her phone as she walked away from the boys**. **"No I did not! Look you obviously have me mistaken for-"She said getting louder, obviously angered that she was being interrupted or ignored."NO! Look listen!"She said now even more distressed and moving further away until out of view of the camera.

"How's it going?" Butters whispered to Cartman sensing the drop in the atmosphere.

"Bitch is on a rant." Cartman muttered back as he watched her leave and the people surrounding them entered their own hushed conversations as they all waited for her to return.

Butters stood for a while twiddling his thumbs awkwardly waiting for the right moment to ask his question that he knew Cartman would get annoyed at.

"Urm…Eric? Ho-how much money do we have now?"

"Butters you know that's confidential." Cartman said quickly not even turning to him. "Can't risk anyone finding out, especially not Stan and Kyle…God I hate those guys."

"Bu-but they're not here." Cartman stayed silent. "Oh come on Eric all I want to know is how much! I won't tell anyone, honest I won't!"

Cartman remained silent and Butters couldn't tell if he was just ignoring him or had walked away.

Butters dropped his shoulders and started to breathe heavier and heavier and Cartman looked at him through the corner of his eye.

"It's not fair…" Butters whispered trying to hold back tears and Cartman scrunched up his face to look at Butters like he was a freak. Is he crying?

"It's not fair; I might end up being blind for a long time!" Butters said softly again with breaks in-between every few words for sharp intakes of breath.

Why the hell is he crying?

"What if I don't see my family again? Or my friends! Or my toys! I won't be able to remember all the colours and then when people try to explain it to me it'll be really hard and awkward!" Butters said much louder and now tears were visible and they were rolling fast down his cheeks.

Cartman looked at him and sighed heavily in annoyance.

"Listen Butters you'll be fine ok you'll be able to see again. Now get ready in case-"

"No I won't! And I'm gonna end up on one of those leaflets where all the disabled children go and they come through your door and-"Butters started getting louder and louder and Cartman began to look around him to make sure he wasn't causing a scene.

"Butters!" Cartman hissed at him to shut up.

"And I'll be on my own 'coz my parents won't be able to cope!"

"Butters!" He hissed louder.

"I don't want to be blind anymore! I want to see!" Butters cried.

"Butters you douche bag you can see!" Cartman said louder over his cries.

"…I can?"

"Yes! Jesus Christ."

"Bu-but you said-"

"I know but don't you see? That was so we could get money off guilt ridden suckers who are out to supposedly free themselves of all their sins by donating loose change to some boy who is exploiting his disability in their faces!"

"Oh."Butters said quietly sensing that Cartman was angry with himand he slowly hesitated to lift his arms to his face and lift up the eye patches a little so he could see out of them and a broad smile spread across his face.

"Look Eric! I can see!"

"He can see?"A voice called that neither of the boys recognized and they turned and looked around them to find that their crowd of pathetic gullible sympathy seekers were all watching them.

"Oh shit." Cartman muttered.

"The bastard can see!" Another shouted

Cartman quickly turned to the camera and to his horror the cameraman was pointing it straight at him; and it was rolling. Behind that was Lindsay with her mouth stuck open and her phone still in her hand but it had dropped from her ear in shock.

"Wh-what do we do Eric" Butters whispered once again breaking the silence. He had now lifted his eye patches completely so he could see all the angered horrified faces staring at them both.

Cartman stood for a while looking around him at everyone getting angrier and clenching their fists.

"Ladies and gentlemen, I give you the miracle of-"

"GET HIM!" The crowd roared interrupting Cartman's attempt at getting out of this one.

The huge crowd of people began charging forward and all Cartman and Butters could do was scream and dive under the feet of the people running towards them with their arms open to grab them.

They managed to army crawl their way through the stamping feet of the crowd and the further they got the easier it was as the people on the outside edges of the crowd didn't know to look underneath them. But by the time they were able to stand up again and run one crowd member saw them again and shouted to alert the others.

"There they go!" She called and Butters and Cartman ran towards the automatic doors of the exit just in front of them.

However, catching all this on CCTV, the mall's security guard thumped his hand down on the big red button in front of him and the automatic doors slowly began to close permanently.

"Oh no!" Butters screamed as they saw the doors shutting slower than usual but they still knew what this meant.

They attempted to gain speed but Cartman's fat was making it harder for him to keep up and his arms were moving frantically at his sides trying to keep him balanced.

Butters managed to get through the door and he looked back at Cartman.

"Come on Eric!" He shouted but Cartman couldn't reply as he was making the usual spluttering noises when he runs too fast for his own good and Butters could see the crowd behind him catching up.

He looked at the slowly closing doors and made the quick split second decision to run back in for Cartman grab his arm and attempt to help pull him through the doors.

The doors were inches from reaching a gap the boys couldn't fit in-between but they just managed to dive through the doors like something out of an action film along with a few other crowd members.

"Get up Eric!" Butters shouted in a strained voice as he lifted Cartman to his feet with the doors shut behind them.

"Go go!" Cartman shouted when he was up and the two began to run just as the others who made it through began to get up.

"Don't let them leave the car park!" They shouted, alerting all who were nearby.

Cars that were just leaving the mall then reversed dangerously in front of the exits and entrances to the car park, blocking their escapes.

"Eric what do we do?" Butters stammered nervously.

"The hedges Butters; crawl through the hedges it's our only chance!" Cartman shouted pointing to hedges the mall had placed at the edge of the car park that separated them from the road, freedom.

But as the boys began to run, the people not in their cars who were just loading them with shopping started to block their way and their hands were open and ready to catch them as they slowly and menacingly walked towards them.

They attempted to run back the way they came but the automatic doors were now open again and the huge crowd that was with them inside, including Lindsay McQueen, was also walking towards them.

Cartman looked around him for more possible escapes only to find that more cars were entering the mall car park and dangerously coming to a halt around them as earlier customers joined the surrounding mob.

"What do we do now Eric?" Butters screamed.

Cartman looked around him at the slowly enclosing circle of people that was surrounding them with furious faces.

"Get him!" One man called.

"Punish him!" Another shouted.

"Kill him!" Farmer Denkins shouted and aimed his rifle up at Cartman and Butters.

But just as Denkins hit the trigger someone crashed into him causing him to be knocked off balance and point his gun elsewhere. The shot still rang out but it hit someone else.

"Argh!" Butters squealed like a girl and Cartman shut his eyes tight waiting for the next bullet that didn't arrive.

The crowd stopped and stared at Denkins for a while with blank faces before closing in again, stopping to trap Cartman and Butters for their last words.

"You took our money and all this time the kid could see?"

Cartman opened one eye to meet his furious money-scheme victims that he would ironically become the victim of.

"Urm…well...yes but…think of the feeling you got when you donated. The feeling of pride for helping someone; the feeling that you made a difference and-"

This just enraged the crowd more and they marched forward causing Cartman to stutter and mumble the last of his words as he was concentrating on the rage filled faces of the people coming towards him.

"The-the feeling…of…helping…"

Butters stood frozen with fear but Cartman just managed to see two figures out of the corner of his eye that he recognized running through the crowd to reach the front…

**A/N: So that's Cartman's story! **

**So Stan grabbing all the attention of his customers in the mall affected Cartman, and hopefully you would've recognized the conversation he had with Stan from Stan's story and why Stan had to be driven back to the mall with Wendy…of course it was all Cartman's fault!**

**But there is of course still more to know, so want to know**

**What happened to Butters?**

**What was wrong with Mr. Garrison?**

**Who Lindsay McQueen was talking to?**

**Why Farmer Denkins was knocked off balance?**

**Who shouted goddamn it in the video store in Stan's story?**

**Why Kenny didn't show up for Stan?**

**Why the queue in the video store was held up?**

**Who prank called Sally and why?**

**And of course what happens in Kyle's story?**

**Then watch this space for the last of the perspectives…Kyle's story!**


	7. Chapter 7 Kyle1

Kyle's day

The day started pretty normally. Kyle was out with Carman, Stan and Kenny on another moneymaking scheme, the one that works best with children their age, selling cookies door to door.

However they weren't being as successful as they'd hoped as they weren't getting many sales just violently shut doors, inches from their faces.

"This is pointless Cartman!" Kyle moaned as they walked away from yet another door that had slammed in their faces.

"We've not been out long enough Kahl!" Cartman said waddling angrily from the door. "Give it time!"

Once at the bottom of the garden Stan leant back against the garden fence of the house they had just been rejected from. Kenny and Kyle joined him rubbing their aching feet.

Kyle looked over to Cartman who was searching for another victim through narrowed eyes.

"Why are we even here this time you guys?" Kyle moaned.

"Yeah." Kenny agreed as a muffle through his coat.

"To be honest, I don't know why we even go with him anymore he-" Stan started but was interrupted when Cartman turned to them with his finger to his mouth and shushed them.

The three looked at him with confusion but remained silent and followed his concentrated gaze until it landed on a young boy and his mother knocking on the door of the house next door to the one they were standing outside.

The boy was younger than them but only by a few years and he had a beaming smile and soft brown hair and his mother looked like the kind and gentle type that every son dreamed of and she was looking down at him with her hand on his back and a huge smile of pride on her face.

The four boys watched in anticipation as the house owner that had slammed the door in their face answered to this young and sweet child and his darling mother. They couldn't hear what was said, or what they were laughing at, but they could tell that the house owner said "Aww" to the young boy after he stretched out his arms and held the box of cookies up. And then they noticed the house owner pass over a few dollars and take a couple of cookies from the child.

Stan, Kenny and Kyle joined Cartman in staring at the child with a dumbfounded and slightly angered expression.

"De fuck?" Cartman said barely moving his face.

"Dude, he just got a sale! What gives?" Stan agreed.

"What a piss take!" Kenny muffled.

The boys watched as the child beamed up at his mother and she placed the money handed to her into her purse. Then, as they began to walk back down the path, the mother took hold of her son's arm very carefully and the closed eyes on the boy, that the four thought were part of the animated beaming smile, remained permanently closed as he walked towards them.

Suddenly the observers felt a little guilty and they stopped staring. They kept their heads low as the child skipped merrily past them clutching onto his mother's hand tightly, both of them smiling.

"Poor kid." Kyle said softly as they watched the blind boy knock on the next door.

"Poor kid? Poor kid? Kahl did you see that wad of cash!" Cartman blurted and the others looked at him in disgust.

Kyle could feel himself getting red in the face with anger once again by the fat dickhead. He always thinks he's heard the worst of it, always thinks it won't get worse…

"Yeah poor kid! I can't imagine anything worse than being blind!" Kyle replied.

"Being poor and blind, but we know that's not the case with these dirty thieves."

…But it always does.

The three stood with wide eyes and gaping jaws, looking at Cartman. Kyle was about to say something else when a shout from behind them interrupted him.

"Stan!"

They all turned around to see Wendy looking at him and beckoning him towards her.

"Wendy?" Stan shouted questioning her appearance.

"Can I talk to you a minute?"

Stan looked back at the guys who rolled their eyes. "It'll only take a minute." He said guiltily and walked towards Wendy.

"Stan no! You have to help with my plan! Stan! God dam it." Cartman shouted and then muttered defeated.

Kyle watched Stan walk away to Wendy. He hasn't been with her very much lately, which was lucky for him; the group just isn't the same without Stan, mainly because he'd go mad with being taken the piss out of all the time.

He then turned back to Cartman with Kenny after watching Stan walk away.

"Dam chicks, they're always ruining things for us guys. Always have done as well! Even Superman was dragged everywhere by Lois Lane, and Mary Jane distracted Spiderman from his duties!"

"What the hell are you talking about Cartman?" Kyle said.

"Not to mention Rachael Dawes!" Kenny added.

"Rachael Dawes?" Kyle questioned turning to Kenny in confusion.

"Rachael Dawes, you know Batman's girl." Kenny reminded him.

"Batman doesn't have a girl." Kyle said and instantly regretted it as Cartman and Kenny gave him shocked and suspicious looks.

"Um…yeah he does Kahl, you know like in the two films Batman Begins and The Dark Knight." Cartman said slowly.

"Oh, oh right." Kyle said, still not entirely sure.

There was another silence as Kenny and Cartman exchanged glances.

"Kahl, you have seen the Dark Knight haven't you?"

Kyle's eyes flipped between Cartman and Kenny's anticipating faces and then he looked down at his feet and bit his lip.

"No! No Kahl!" Cartman immediately burst out. "You haven't seen the Dark Knight?"

"Alright so I haven't so what!" Kyle said defensively and Cartman and Kenny flung their arms in the air and sighed dramatically. "What?"

"Kahl if you haven't seen the Dark Knight you haven't completed the checklist!" Cartman said looking at him desperately like he had betrayed them. Kyle returned the favour by looking at him like he was speaking a foreign language.

"What checklist?"

"It's from a book called The Dude in you." Kenny started, and Kyle was thankful he was talking to someone he could probably get some sense out of. "It has a checklist in it made for kids our age that we have all managed to tick every box in."

Kyle looked between the two confused as to why this was so important to them.

"Basically Kahl, if you haven't ticked everything in this book then you're not the guy we thought you were."

Kyle paused for a minute and then looked at the two in shock slightly hurt.

"You mean, if I haven't completed this checklist I won't be able to hang out with you guys anymore?"

As Kyle looked at him, Kenny rolled his eyes down and shuffled his feet to try and avoid the awkward hurt looks he was getting but Cartman just stared back at him.

Kyle stood and watched them for a while to see if any of them would say something like "No not really Kyle, you're a great friend the way you are." But they said nothing.

Yeah here it is, as soon as Stan's gone they turn on me.

"Alright! Fine! Gimmie this checklist!" Kyle roared.

Cartman slowly reached into his bag and pulled out a book with a picture of the Fonz with his thumbs up on the front cover and a title above him saying The Dude in you.

He held it out to Kyle who looked at him angrily and placed his hand on the book to take it away but Cartman pulled it back just before he could.

"I warn you Kahl, you're not going to like some of the stuff in here."

Kyle looked at him threateningly through narrowed eyes and ignored him, snatching the book from his hands and began to march away.

"Hey Kahl." Cartman shouted making Kyle stop and turn back to him.

"Every last box." He said menacingly and smiled a smile that Kyle recognized all too well but he ignored it and continued walking away.

What the hell am I doing? Kyle always thinks when this sort of thing happens. Why the hell do I feel like I need to prove myself to that fat fuck? I shouldn't have to! I don't have to! But I do…there's that little bit of niggling hope that if I complete all of Cartman's tests I might come out on top; because that's all it is, a stupid game. A game that I didn't volunteer for, but I've just been in for years because that egotistical sad fatass decided he wanted to play; and he always gets his way. I guess that explains why I'm walking away from him now with this stupid book in my hand.

He came to a quiet spot not far from Cartman, Kenny and Stan (he just didn't want Cartman to watch him) and opened the book.

There was a picture of the Fonz again staring up at him with a suave smile and his thumbs up and pointing to the checklist. Kyle rolled his eyes and looked up at the box that stated the films he needed to watch to 'be cool'

3) Watch the following films: Godfather, The Dark Knight, Die Hard, Terminator, Alien, Braveheart…

He also skimmed across the other boxes to see what sort of degrading things he would have to do that day.

One of the boxes that he read instructed him to 8) Beat up a nerdy/wimpy kid, and Kyle looked at it in disgust.

"I can't believe they'd encourage this in a kid's book!" He said aloud but could just imagine the fatass looking at him like he was pathetic.

"Oh shut up Jew boy and do it! Either that or spend your school days hanging out with the nerds of the school!"

Kyle looked at the imaginary image of his enemy with narrowed eyes. Eventually his image faded and Butters appeared behind it walking towards him, which surprised Kyle and made him feel a little embarrassed for looking at nothing.

"Well hey Kyle, what you got there?" He said cheerily with a beaming smile.

Kyle looked down into the book and at the Fonz who smiled up at him smugly like he was egging Kyle on.

"It's urm…just this stupid book." He replied eventually and snapped the book shut to avoid the Fonz's gaze.

"Oh. Well you looked like you were on your own so I thought I'd just come and see what you were up to!" Butters smiled.

Kyle began rubbing his fingers together nervously, Butters is the wimpiest kid he knows and this was the perfect opportunity to hit him. But does he really want to? Butters didn't do anything to him; he was just in the wrong place at the wrong time…story of his life.

"Kyle?"

Kyle could imagine Cartman's annoying laugh in his head and his constant taunting words, his smug face and fat ass.

"Kyle?" Butters asked again worriedly.

Closing his eyes Kyle could see Carman laughing at him. He should be able to ignore the words and the laughs, he was always taught to find the good in people but with Cartman…there just is none.

"Kyle?" Butters questioned again, now getting very nervous at Kyle's silence.

Kyle was getting angrier and angrier at his own stupid sensitivity to Cartman's words and his gullible falls to his lies until he blew his top. His eyes burst open and his image of Cartman appeared again replacing Butters in front of him.

He threw his fist up and smacked it back down on Butters' face in anger.

Butters began to sob in pain and he was clutching one eye with his hands and the other eye was tightly shut. Kyle just stood dumbfounded next to him not knowing what to do.

"Owy owy owy!" Butters cried.

Kyle wanted to say sorry but couldn't get the words out; he couldn't believe he just hit him! He looked around him and found that luckily no one had seen him do it, so he slowly backed away from Butters and when he was far enough he ran.

* * *

><p>Kyle slowed again when he was far away from Butters and his cries. He leant against the wall behind him out of breath.<p>

He looked down at the hand that had just hit Butters, his hand, and then he looked in his other hand that he noticed had been clutching the book whilst he was running.

"You win Fonz." He sighed and opened the book again. If he had done what seemed like the worst of the challenges, he may as well do the rest. He opened the book and the Fonz smiled at him smugly, almost proud.

He thought he would get the DVD challenge done first since that was the one playing on his mind the most after the embarrassing conversation with Cartman and Kenny.

He walked into the video store and immediately turned left into the action films aisle.

He didn't bother looking for all the films on the list, his stamina isn't as good as Cartman and Kenny's when it comes to watching multiple films in a row, but focused his attention on looking for The Dark Knight.

After a while of searching he had been up and down the aisle almost five times before he decided to move on to another aisle, although he knew it was unlikely he would find it in the 'family favourites' or 'Horror/Sci-fi' aisles.

He moved up and down other aisles until he stopped in animation films, the one just next to girl territory, the chick flicks and romances.

It can't be that great a film if I can't find it here! Kyle thought as he looked pointlessly through children's animation films. Eventually he came to the very last DVD on display after his sixth attempt down this aisle.

"God dam it!" He blurted out-loud in anger and marched to the front of the store to the counter.

"Hey!" He called to the man behind the counter. "Why isn't The Dark Knight here?"

The man turned to face him with a blank expression "The Dark Knight…" He replied slowly as he was thinking and Kyle could tell this would be a long conversation. "The Dark Knight…" He said again more quietly like he was thinking to himself.

"Yes, The Dark Knight…" Kyle said looking firmly into the eyes of the man trying to get his attention again.

"Now…now I think The Dark Knight was here…buuuuttt…"

Kyle rubbed the bridge of his nose with his fingers.

"No I remember!" The man said pointing his finger up like a light bulb had appeared above his head.

Kyle looked hopefully up at him.

"…nope lost it." He said and brought his hand back down to his chin to rub it.

"Look!" Kyle snapped. "I just want to know if you have The Dark Knight in store, or has someone already rented it?"

"…no?" The man guessed as a random answer.

"No what?" Kyle shouted.

The man thought again for a while like he was under serious pressure and he reminded Kyle of the one guy on a TV quiz show who fails the easy question and everyone takes the piss out of at school the next day.

"Hurry up!" Kyle heard someone shout from behind him and as he turned to see who it was he noticed a huge queue had built up and everyone was looking at him impatiently.

"Urgh, never mind!" Kyle said angrily to the man behind the counter and stormed off out of the shop, it wasn't worth it.

* * *

><p>7) Hang around a street corner.<p>

Kyle was stood leaning on the wall of a corner shop obeying the seventh box on the checklist.

He had been stood there for some time with his hands in his pockets just leaning, watching the world go about its life around him. It was as boring as hell.

He never realised how much effect body language could have on people, as they often passed him with dirty looks or worried expressions thinking he would attack them. It got him thinking again if this was all really worth it but he didn't bother thinking about it too much knowing he would just come to the same conclusion. As much as he hates to admit it, and he never would out-loud, Cartman has him exactly where he wants him most of the time.

He sighed heavily and leant his head back against the wall when his pocket started to vibrate. He pulled out his phone and saw the caller ID was Stan; he put it to his ear in surprise.

"Stan?"

"Kyle, hey."

"Stan, where did you go dude?" Kyle questioned when he remembered back to him leaving with Wendy somewhere.

There was a pause on the other end and it sounded like he was thinking hard about his answer.

"My parents need me at home, chores and stuff."

Kyle knew Stan well enough to tell he was lying. But if Stan didn't want him to know where he was he didn't see the point in arguing with him to get the truth out.

"Weak." He replied, playing along.

"Right? Where are you?"

"Oh you're not going to believe this Stan!"Kyle started. "I was talking to Cartman and Kenny after you left and they showed me this stupid cheesy book for 'how to be cool'! And get this it's called "The Dude in you" I mean Jesus this thing is aimed at kids our age and yet some of the things in here are ridiculous! You know, all the things teachers tell you not to do. Then again I guess that's what being cool is all about. I wouldn't be surprised if The Fonz asked me to rob a bank next! Because yes, the Fonz is on the front cover. He didn't write it but for some reason his face is on it, apparently he's the epitome of cool! When do you think your parents will let you out of chores? I'm so bored of this!"

There was a short pause as Stan didn't reply and Kyle was about to check he was still there when he eventually spoke.

"So Cartman's not with you?" He said with a tone of worry that Kyle picked up immediately.

"Cartman?" Kyle questioned confused.

Stan didn't reply again and Kyle heard it was because someone shouted him, only he didn't know who it was or what they shouted until Stan told him inadvertently.

"Cartman?" He shouted, shocked.

"Is that Cartman?" Kyle asked trying to make sense of what Stan was doing.

Cartman began to talk to Stan and he sounded pissed off, as usual; luckily Stan still answered him.

"Yeah dude, hang on."

Kyle listened hard pushing the phone against his ear as something told him it would help but he didn't hear a lot, Stan was desperately questioning Cartman about something.

He then, just about, heard Cartman mumble something before the phone's dial tone rang out in his ear.

"Stan?" He asked the lifeless phone. "Stan? God dam it Cartman." He muttered when he knew the phone had been switched off and it doesn't get you a prize to guess who it was.

He looked up from the phone and noticed all the people passing still looking at him so he shook his head and picked up the book from the floor.

"That's enough of this Fonz." He said and ticked the seventh box on the checklist.

"Alright then…" He said out-loud as he was skimming along the boxes for what to do next.

2) Upset a girl, making her cry

Kyle looked at the box for a while trying to figure out if it was serious or not. When he realised that Fonz wasn't going to change his mind on this one he rolled his eyes and pulled out his phone again.


	8. Chapter 8 Kyle2

**A/N: Thank you to all who reviewed on my last chapter! It means a lot and its good to hear that you're enjoying the story! **

So we now know what happened to Butters and why his eye was already bruised when he met Cartman.

But of course there is still more to know! So I won't keep you any longer, enjoy…

Kyle remembered getting one of the girls in his class' phone numbers once when they all went on a school trip. They were all paired boy-girl and their stupid tour guide insisted they all had their partner's phone number, he just hadn't bothered to get rid of it since then.

He was about to press the dial button on his phone when he thought quickly over what he was going to say in his head, it didn't sound great.

How do you make a girl cry? He questioned himself when something at the bottom of the page, in small writing, caught his attention.

Want to know how to make a girl cry?

He raised his eyebrow in surprise at his luck.

He turned to the page suggested and found it was a full page of dialogue set out like a script. The title of the page read "How to make a girl cry" and underneath that was a subtitle. "Need help with your checklist?"

Kyle looked hard at the page and noticed that once again Fonz was at the top with his thumbs up smiling.

The dialogue was set out between two people, the reader and the girl, and as he read through it he noticed the book had guessed everything the girl would say.

Jesus, who do these people think they are? Kyle thought. How the hell do they know what the girl will say word for word! This is stupid!

Kyle flicked the pages back to the checklist, trying to ignore that box completely, when his imaginary Cartman appeared again laughing.

"Oh Kahl! You don't have enough faith in the Fonz! Oh no wait that's not it is it…you're just a Jew! And Jews suck ass! You don't have the guts to make a girl cry because you're a pussy Jew!" He said to his own amusement and began laughing hysterically to himself.

Kyle twitched with rage and pulled the pages back to the dialogue with Fonz smiling at him smugly again.

"Yeah yeah, shut up." Kyle said aloud to him. He pulled out his phone and, without thinking, pressed to dial Sally.

"Hello?" Sally said cheerily when she answered and Kyle had to quickly look down at the given script when he realised what he was doing, snapping out of his braver 'do-anything-to-prove-Cartman-wrong' trance.

"Urm…is this Sally Turner?" He said nervously.

"Yes, this is she."

"Urm…well…" Kyle started and followed the script anxiously with his finger as he read it, hoping she would say the right lines. "Well I just think you should know that everyone in school has been talking about you…" He said robotically as he read the script word for word. "And it's not looking good for you 'name of girl'-oh I mean Sally!"

"What?" Sally replied quietly and softly.

Kyle read the next part of the script and was surprised to find that Sally did as she was supposed to by saying that but he quickly continued before she said something off-script.

"Yeah no one in the school likes you; they've all been talking about you and especially the way you look."

"Who-who is this?" Sally said with tears welling up in her eyes.

Kyle was relieved to hear that she obviously didn't keep his number in her contacts and was even more surprised to find that Sally was now sticking to the script exactly.

"That doesn't matter; I'm just someone who thinks you should know the truth. Everyone thinks you're ugly, you look like a train wreck every morning and you should sort your life out because no one likes you."

"Who told you that?" Sally continued and it was now obvious that she was crying through the continuing sharp intakes of breath.

"No one needed to tell me, it's all around the school."

Kyle waited as Sally didn't say anything else and he looked down at the next part of the script to see it read:

Congratulations! If the conversation ended here, you made her cry! If not please read on.

He looked up again and listened hard for Sally's reply but there was nothing and eventually the dial tone rang out.

Initially he was relieved that is was over and the fact that he made her cry made him feel like the conversation wasn't totally embarrassing and pointless, but then he realised what he had just done.

Cartman, you son-of-a-bitch. He thought. This is the sort of thing Cartman would do anyway without being asked and now he was doing it…for what?

He began to get a little worried when he couldn't come up with a reason because if he couldn't come up with a reason then he's just as bad as Cartman!

He looked down at the book again and the Fonz looked up at him like he was beginning to gain a little respect from him.

Is it really worth it? Kyle thought. Sure I'd get some respect from Kenny and the fat ass but I really couldn't give a crap about them. Besides Cartman would still go back to treating me like shit eventually. Maybe I'd get some more respect around the school but do I need anymore than the status I've got there?

He began to think about who he would gain respect from in the school when he remembered that the one person whose opinion mattered most, hadn't been able to give it.

He assumed Stan had read the checklist and ticked every box but he didn't really know if he'd even heard of it. If he hadn't then why should he give a crap what Cartman and the rest of the school thinks?

But if he has its clear this stupid book obviously means a lot to them and if he doesn't tick the boxes, he won't be hanging out with them anymore. Its probably important to the whole school, even if it is just another stupid phase he was behind on. Besides he had already ticked off what must be the worst, there's not much point in giving up now so he read the next checklist box.

4) Cheat on a test

"Well there's only one person to help me with that…"

Kenny normally hangs out at the mall when he's not with Kyle, Stan and Cartman. The three don't know what he does there, probably shop lifting for his starving family or some lame excuse, but they don't really care. It's better than him being at home cheesing or something else just as bad he's likely to do.

When Kyle entered the mall it was fairly quiet for a Saturday, in fact it was empty. He could only see one person as he wandered through the ghost town of open but empty shops and he held his puzzled expression as he ventured further in and around the mall, looking around for signs of normalcy.

The good thing about it being so quiet was it was a lot easier to spot Kenny in his bright orange hoodie walking briskly past him, practically running.

"Kenny!" Kyle shouted with a smile and Kenny stopped to look behind him with a puzzled expression, probably surprised to see another person in the empty space.

"Kenny hey!" Kyle called again and walked towards him. "I need your help with something."

Kenny stood practically on tiptoes moving his weight from one foot to the other and he kept moving his mouth as if he wanted to say something but stopped himself to make this conversation end quickly. Kyle looked at him confused but didn't bother questioning him yet. "Can you help?"

Kenny remained looking at him but it was obvious he was still torn between him and something else. "Help with what?"

"This stupid checklist!"

Kenny sighed and looked over his shoulder in the direction he had been going. Then he turned back and held his hand out to look at the book and although he was now facing Kyle his legs still couldn't stay still, like they were still telling him to leave.

"Its box four." Kyle said as he handed over the book and pointed out the box.

Kenny narrowed his eyes to read it. "I thought it would be box nine." He eventually replied.

Kyle looked at him confused and pulled the book towards him again to read box nine.

9) Tell a teacher what for.

"What for?"

"Yeah what for, you know, tell em what you really think." Kenny muffled. "But look I'm sorry Kyle I have to go! But hey don't worry about it I'll help you with box four when we're back at school and I've just passed Mr. Garrison a few minutes ago so you can go and do box nine now!" Kenny said and turned to walk away again when Kyle shouted him back.

"Well wa-wa-wait Kenny what do I say?" Kyle stammered.

"Anything! What you really think of him!"

"I don't know what to say! Can't you just come and tell me?"

Kenny opened his mouth to say something but he didn't know what.

"It'll take two minutes!" Kyle pleaded.

Kenny took a deep breath in, making his chest rise, as he thought of an answer. He held his breath on the verge of saying no but Kyle realized this and begged with an anxious, innocent smile making him once again completely torn. So he let his breath out again in a long sigh. "Alright but two minutes!"

The two sped around the corner to try and catch up with Mr. Garrison from where Kenny had last seen him and luckily they found him still sitting outside an indoor coffee shop with Mr. Hat.

However they didn't expect to him to still be there so frantically forced themselves to a sudden halt and dived behind a decorative bush before he saw or heard them and watched closely through the fake leaves.

"Alright." Kenny whispered. "What do you wanna shout?"

"Shout?" Kyle answered in the same hushed tone looking sharply to Kenny in surprise.

"Yeah, he'll never even know it was you! What annoys you about him?"

Kyle turned back to face Mr. Garrison whilst he thought. He was drinking his coffee out of one hand and Mr. Hat was moving up and down on the other supposedly having a conversation with him.

"Well for one there's that stupid Mr. Hat he carries around. What does he think we are, six? Let's face it the only reason he has it if for his own-"

"Hey Garrison! Why don't you go stick that puppet up your ass!" Kenny shouted interrupting him whilst parting the branches of the bush then snapping them shut as he ducked behind them again.

Kyle just stared at him open mouthed and then joined him in staring out at Mr. Garrison to see his reaction.

"What? Who said that?" Mr. Garrison said in surprise.

"Go on your turn." Kenny whispered to Kyle with a beaming smile.

Kyle looked at him and them out at Mr. Garrison.

"Yeah and urm…then you can get married to it!"

"Who is that?" Mr. Garrison shouted as he stood up and frantically looked around him.

"I bet you and him would have a great time on the honeymoon!" Kenny shouted and both he and Kyle burst into fits of laughter that Mr. Garrison heard.

"Oh yeah very funny! You think you're so smart don't you, you little smart ass!" He shouted in no particular direction into the open whilst spinning around looking for them.

"I hope your hand has met your parents, mind!" Kyle shouted making Kenny and him clench their teeth down on their clenched fists to stop them from laughing but it failed and instead their faces slowly coloured red and their eyes began to water.

"Alright that's it, I don't have to put up with this crap you son-of-a-bitch! I can find out who you are!"

Mr. Garrison continued to shout random threats but that just made Kyle and Kenny laugh even harder.

"You hear me! You've won this round you little coward but we can easily make this into a war!" He shouted in anger whilst collecting his shopping bags and leaving his half full cup of coffee and newspaper.

"Ooh, don't get the puppet police!" Kenny shouted after him and he and Kyle continued to laugh so hard they were holding their stomachs as Mr. Garrison disappeared into the newly formed crowds around them.

They eventually stepped out of the bush still laughing and wiping tears from their eyes. They were laughing so hard that they failed to notice the mall had suddenly got busier again, especially on the ground floor they were on.

"Dude, that was easy!" Kyle said once he had contained his laughter.

"Haha I told you!" Kenny laughed and they both started back the way they came.

As they turned the corner, only just managing their laughter, they bumped into a middle-aged couple with bloodshot eyes and drooping faces of sadness.

"Oh we're sorry boys!" The man said with a smile that he was trying to hold up but as soon as he had finished his sentence it dropped again like a heavy weight.

"It's cool." Kyle said looking up at them suspiciously and Kenny shared the same expression.

The woman took a quick glance at the boys and her eyes grew wide in shock. She placed her palm onto her husband's chest as she turned to him.

"Oh George, aren't these two in the same class as our boy!"

The man looked down at them and then brought his hand up to clench his wife's.

"I think they are Ann, and that means they're in Butters' class."

Kyle and Kenny exchanged glances and then slowly looked back up to them, a voice in the back of Kyle's head was telling him to walk slowly away.

"Yeah…we know Butters…" He said slowly and confused as to why it meant so much.

The woman let out a short sigh before bursting into tears and she buried her head into her husband's neck. He too looked like he was holding back the water works.

"I'm so sorry, boys." He said and took a deep breath in. "It must be very hard for you at this time."

Kyle and Kenny now stood with a frozen expression of confusion staring up at the two like they were freaks. The man then bent down to their level causing his wife to take her head from his neck and reveal her face again, now bright red, flooded with tears and smudged make-up.

"It's going to be ok boys." He whispered. Kenny had already taken a step back when he leant down to them and Kyle was now slowly trying to do the same.

Suddenly he stood straight again and took hold of his wife's hand and the two stood staring into each other for a while, lips trembling weakly, before crying again. They then walked away from the two sobbing uncontrollably as they did.

"What the fuck was that?" Kenny muffled.

Kyle didn't answer for a while as he watched the couple until they turned another corner out of sight.

"I…really don't know." He eventually said slowly shaking his head.

He then turned back around to Kenny and they only took another couple of steps together before Kenny stopped and froze like a wide-eyed statue.

"Stan!" He blurted.

"Stan?" Kyle questioned stopping to look back at him.

"Oh shit I almost forgot, I've gotta go Kyle!"

Before Kyle had the chance to question him further he was already running through the mall's hectic crowds.

"See you Monday!" He shouted back over his shoulder to make him seem a little less like he was just ditching Kyle.

So all Kyle could do was stand and watch him dodge and dive through the legs of busy shoppers until he disappeared.

**A/N: And that's why Kenny never turned up for Stan! D: And we know why Mr. Garrison was in such a mood when he passed Cartman and that it was Kyle who shouted in the video store and who held up the queue!**

**But there is of course still more to know, so want to know:**

**Who Lindsay McQueen was talking to?**

**Why Farmer Denkins was knocked off balance?**

**And where is Kyle during the riot?**

**Then watch this space!**


	9. Chapter 9 Kyle3

A/N: Hello again! If you've come this far I'm hoping you're enjoying the story and are eager to know what happens next!

**Thank you to all the followers of this story for reviewing and keeping up to date because it really means a lot to me! Enjoy…**

Kyle made his way home after being in the mall with Kenny. It seemed most of the checklist boxes left were stuff he could do at home anyway.

5) Pull an all-nighter

6) Prank call someone (preferably nice and friendly etc)

1) Lie to parents

Pull an all-nighter would be easy, of course it would be easier if he had The Dark Knight to watch, but lying to his parents would require a little more thought.

Instead he sat on the sofa in his living room looking through the contacts in his phone for someone nice and gullible to prank call. Obviously the first name to spring to mind was Butters but after what he did to him this morning and the conversation with the weirdoes at the mall he decided that probably wouldn't be a good idea.

His parents had left the TV on as they went upstairs to see Ike but he wasn't paying attention to it. He skimmed through all the names on his phone, his eyes slowly narrowing from concentrating on the small screen until a voice on the TV said something that caught his attention.

"In just a few minutes we'll be going live to Lindsay McQueen for her report on a young boy with a big problem…"

Kyle looked up to the TV in confusion and saw a man sitting in a very basic studio behind a cheap desk with very little on it. In the top left hand corner there was a symbol of a red cross and underneath it read: Charity Channel.

"Charity channel? What the hell is the-"

"For those who are new to the Charity Channel, maybe you haven't looked to channel 423 before, we are a whole channel donating our time to publicising charity events and the causes for which we are fighting!"

Kyle would have normally turned the TV off immediately after hearing this before he had disabled children, starving Africans and Alzheimer pensioners shoved into his face but he left it on. He looked over to the seat on the sofa next to him where the book was resting and the Fonz was grinning like he knew something and was waiting eagerly for Kyle to figure it out.

"If you have a story you would like us to talk about, please contact our reporter Lindsay McQueen for an interview! The number is on your screen now!"

The Fonz continued to look at Kyle in the way he had been doing all day and even Kyle was surprised to find that he himself had raised the corner of his mouth to a smile.

He picked up his phone and quickly punched in the numbers on the screen before they went.

By the looks of the channel, and the desperate faces of the presenters, he could imagine that Lindsay wasn't expecting a phone call; only he wasn't going to call about a charity story. He knew of a prank calling joke he Stan, Cartman and Kenny once played on someone so he decided to run with that one.

He went into the kitchen where it was quieter and once he pressed his phone to dial he only had to wait a couple of rings before someone answered, however Lindsay's voice sounded less than pleased.

"Hello? Who is this?"

"Hello Lindsay McQueen? I'm calling about the $500 painting you ordered." Kyle said quickly, a little stunned from her abruptness and only just remembering what the opening line of the prank was on the spot.

There was a short pause on the other end. "No I did not! Look you obviously have me mistaken for-"

"Yeah just saying it will probably be a little late since-" Kyle continued ignoring her completely.

"No! Look listen!" She shouted angrily. "I don't know what you're talking about I-"

"No no no no no Lindsay you signed the paper yesterday at the gallery. This thing belongs to you."

"What? What gallery? I've never been to a gallery! How did you get this number?"

"You gave it to us Lindsay, after you filled in your credit card details you left us all your contact details so we could-"

"Credit card?" She screamed. This was working a charm, she was reacting worse than the last person they tried it on.

"Yes credit card."

"Oh no! You are kidding!"

"I assure you ma'am, we don't kid." Yeah he admits it that sounded better when Cartman said it.

"Look I can't deal with this now I'm trying to film something!"

Kyle's smile widened at the thought of his prank being seen on TV so he ran back into the living room where the TV was still on. However when he got there he was disappointed to see the screen was just black with bold white writing in the middle saying 'technical difficulties'

"Dam it." He muttered. 

"Sorry?" Lindsay questioned still on the phone that had dropped slightly from his ear.

"Oh urm…" Kyle coughed to make sure the right voice was back. "Listen Lindsay, we have a painting here of a frog in a dress climbing a mountain of red flowers." Kyle said trying hard to remember what he Stan, Cartman and Kenny said initially. "It's a symbolic piece about truth and justice and you bought it for no less than $500."

"…That sounds like the most stupid-"

"That's not what you said last night."

Lindsay screamed in frustration so loud that Kyle had to hold the phone away from his ear.

He could feel himself starting to laugh and attempted to pull down his growing smile meaning he couldn't say anything else to her until he had it under control. When he finally calmed down he was about to say the next part when the TV screen suddenly became bright and coloured again as the original filming flashed back on.

To Kyle's complete surprise it was Cartman…Cartman and Butters…wearing two eye patches. The two were standing in the mall surrounded by groups of people with tissues and watering eyes like the couple he and Kenny saw.

The people were all talking amongst themselves, obviously there for the two boys but no one was looking at them. He just managed to hear Butters say something aloud to Cartman.

"And I'll be on my own 'coz my parents won't be able to cope!" He heard Butters sob.

"Hello? Hello? Are you still there? Hello?" Lindsay screamed down his other ear but he blanked her completely and stood staring at the TV screen with a frozen expression of utter confusion.

"I don't want to be blind anymore! I want to see!" Butters cried.

Kyle stared at the TV screen. What the fuck have you done now fatass?

"Butters you douche bag you can see!" Cartman said louder over his cries.

"I can?"

Part of Kyle was relieved that Cartman hadn't done something that could get him in serious shit but then, as he continued to talk to Butters, Kyle saw the faces of some of the crowd members that had now turned in because they heard him and he knew he was in serious shit anyway.

"I know but don't you see?" Cartman continued. "That was so we could get money off guilt ridden suckers who are out to supposedly free themselves of all their sins by donating loose change to some boy who is exploiting his disability in their faces!"

Cartman practically shouted this and Kyle stood with his mouth hung open, so stunned that he failed to notice Lindsay had stopped screaming at him, probably joining the others in staring at Cartman.

Everyone in the mall, Kyle and the few people watching the charity channel, then watched in horror as Butters lifted his arms to his face and lifted up the eye patches to look out, causing a huge broad smile to spread across his face.

"Look Eric! I can see!" He cried

"He can see?"A voice called from the audience causing Butters and Cartman to look around them finally at the hundreds of people who had been watching them.

"The bastard can see!" Another voice shouted.

Cartman stared straight towards the camera in horror and straight at Kyle making him imagine he was there with him, like he always normally is. For that split second he felt the same fear as Cartman must be feeling as the people surrounding them began to clench their fists and knock their knuckles against their palms.

Butters, who had now lifted his eye patches completely so he could see all the angered horrified faces staring at them, leant over slightly to Cartman to whisper something in his ear but he was ignored.

"Ladies and gentlemen, I give you the miracle of-" Cartman started to redeem himself but his audience wouldn't have it.

"GET HIM!" They shouted interrupting Cartman's attempt and Kyle watched in shock as the camera was knocked over in the rush of people running after Cartman and Butters, filling the screen with scrambling legs and feet.

He stood for a few seconds trying to take in what he had just seen.

"He probably deserves it; he's always doing shit like this. It's about time he learnt his lesson." He said out loud to try and convince himself that's what he really felt inside. But deep down his morals and general guilt climbed up his spine and were knocking to get into his head.

Kyle shut his eyes tightly and rubbed the bridge of his nose with his finger and thumb, an epic battle of right and wrong taking place in his head.

"God dam it." He eventually sighed giving in to his conscience and he ran to the door, slipped on his gloves and headed out to the mall again.

When Kyle made it to the mall car park there was already a huge crowd and the fact that they didn't have pitchforks and flaming torches was the only thing that stopped them from looking like a village of medieval rioters.

He bravely threw himself into the midst of the angry mob, ducking and diving between their stomping feet and marching legs desperately looking for Cartman and Butters who he guessed would be somewhere in the middle or the front.

At one point he saw a clearing ahead of him into a small space where he could check where he was in relation to the front. He ran towards it but just as he was about to reach it yet another pair of legs unexpectedly stood in his way. Kyle attempted to stop himself but he crashed into them causing the body they were connected to to be knocked off balance.

With this a gunshot rang out above him and Kyle looked desperately up at the man he had hit into to see it was Denkins holding a rifle. Kyle looked wide-eyed up to him in shock. This was more out of hand than he thought!

"Omg they killed Kenny!" Came a random shout that Kyle just managed to pick up from the temporary silence.

"You bastards!" He shouted back knowing that call could have come from no one but Stan.

"Dang that was my last bullet!" Denkins said above him but Kyle ignored him and started to move towards Stan's voice ducking his head and covering it with his hands in fear of another, more serious, accident. As Kyle was walking the angry rambles of the crowd got louder until they once again became angered shouts. "Kyle?" He heard Stan faintly shout ahead of him.

"Stan!" Kyle shouted back.

"Kyle!" Stan said with a beaming smile when the two met up underneath the stomping feet around them. "Dude, what's going on?"

Kyle was about to answer but looking at Stan's face distracted him…it was covered with make-up. He looked like a pantomime dame. He was so concentrated on the sight in front of him and deciding what to make of it that he didn't notice his own face was scrunching up into a look of absolute horror and confusion and although he was looking directly at Stan's face he failed to notice his aggravated expression.

"Dude?" Stan called angrily to grab Kyle's attention again.

Kyle remained staring at him like he was from another planet and then finally gestured his hand in front of his face to indicate what was wrong with his.

"Dude, you…you do know you're covered in make-up?"

Stan's eyes shot open and he pulled his sleeve over his hand and started rubbing the make-up from his face, leaving a colourful stain on his jacket sleeve and Kyle watched as his friend's face turned bright pink. He held back his laughter for the sake of concentrating on the serious situation they were in.

"Wh-what's going on then?" Stan said stumbling over his words embarrassed.

"It's Cartman dude!" Kyle continued still a little taken back. "The fatass did something stupid again and he's dragged Butters into it as well but this time he's gonna pay! I think they're at the front!" Kyle called over the ramblings that were now making it difficult for them to hear each other even though they were face-to-face.

"I should've known." Stan replied.

Kyle watched Stan closely as he too considered leaving Cartman but then, looking around him, realised how serious the situation was getting and eventually came to the same conclusion as he did.

"Alright, let's go."

**A/N: So all the stories have finally caught up with each other! And we know who called Lindsay during filming, why farmer Denkins was knocked off balance and how Kyle got into the angry crowds!**

**Now all that's left is the final chapter!**

**Please don't forget to review if you enjoyed it or even if you didn't to tell me why and what I can do better :)**

**Watch this space! **


	10. Chapter 10 The End

**A/N: Here it is the last chapter! All three stories have merged together again...**

Stan and Kyle ran through the crowd, frantically dodging and diving through and in-between legs until they reached the front and stood between the crowd and Cartman and Butters, desperately holding their arms out in front of them for protection.

"Wait!" They shouted and the crowd stopped and stared at them.

"Wait?" One confused member said slowly.

"Look we know how pissed off you must be at them, trust us we get just as blood thirsty as you are now when Cartman pisses us off." Stan said quickly with his arms still out standing in front of Cartman.

"Yeah." Kyle agreed. "We could kick his ass and then throttle him 'til he dies then bring him back from the dead and throttle him all over again!"

"Ey!" Cartman snapped angrily behind them.

"But I learned something today." Kyle added whilst slowly lowering his arms again. "That no matter how much you pretend to be someone else, you are who you are. I am a nerdy, 'un-cool' Jew but that's just how I like myself, I shouldn't have to change! And no matter how many cool checklists you show me I won't change. People will just have to live with me the way I am." He smiled.

"Yeah, you can't just be someone different to please others." Stan agreed just as Wendy emerged from the crowd to find him. "You are who you are and if someone wants you to change just so it suits them, well, that isn't right and they aren't worth you changing for." He directed to her and she looked at him sorrowfully before hanging her head in shame.

Cartman looked at the two with confusion but then looked up to the audience, who he noticed were in the palm of their hands. Their angered, clenched fists were relaxed and their frowning eyebrows drooped and looked sympathetically at the boys.

He decided it was time for him to do the things he does best: take the opportunity, act innocent, manipulate the people and come out on top.

"That's right." Cartman started slowly to make sure the sound of his voice didn't turn the crowd's fury on again. "I also learned that you are who you are and you shouldn't change that." He said moving forward in-between Kyle and Stan who frowned at him. "It was wrong of me to trick you into thinking someone was something else. And I'm sorry; I will never do anything like this ever again, I've learned my lesson." He said with an innocent saddened face that hung low in shame and he clasped his hands on his stomach.

The crowd looked down at all the boys and then began to hush murmured whispers amongst themselves as they attempted to come up with an agreed answer.

"Alright boys." Jimbo said walking towards the front. "It looks like you've all learned a lesson today." He said with a smile and the rest of the crowd mirrored his change in mood.

The boys looked at each other and smiled with relief as Butters joined them.

"I've been thinking though fellas; maybe we should be setting up a real charity. You see I learned something today, what it feels like to be blind. Well I may not have been it really physically but inside it was scary. If we set up a real charity for the blind we could carry on selling cookies for $1 and give the money to those who really do need it!" Butters stammered.

The boys just looked at him with blank faces.

"Butters…shut the hell up." Cartman said blankly.

Wendy had stepped forwards in the silence to talk to Stan and now tapped him gently on the shoulder.

"Stan, I'm sorry I dragged you around with me and made you do stuff you didn't want to." She said softly in the voice that Stan fell for every time.

"It's ok Wendy." He said with a forgiving smile. "Only maybe we could stick to just seeing each other in school?"

Wendy smiled back and reached her hand out to his and clasped it gently, which made him go weak at the knees and throw up a little.

The boys watched him do this and laughed thankful that everything was back to normal.

"I love you guys." Cartman smiled.

"Oh but Eric we need all the money returned to everyone who donated." Jimbo added and Cartman looked at him with horror.

"What?" He shouted.

But he was too late as at least half the crowd had already made their way back into the mall to collect their money from Cartman's bag.

"No! No you can't take my money! That took me all day to earn! Ey!" Cartman shouted as he tried to run back through the crowds and stop them.

**A/N: And that's it :) Thank you SO SO SO much to anyone who reviewed, it gives me the confidence to continue on a story if I know people like it :) **

**SO PLEASE REVIEW this chapter as well! If you think there are areas where I can improve for my next story let me know or if you like something I did and want me to continue, basically what you would like to read! **

**I do have an idea for my next one if you like reading my stories so keep an eye out for that ;)**


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